“You two are practically joined at the hip, most of the time.”

Another Country -2-
Erin Halfelven

I took a walk around the downtown area. I went as far north as the bike shop and browsed the shiny metal and black rubber of the bikes. There was a five-speed that I just might be able to afford if I got the money I was expecting for my birthday in three months. It was red with a white leather seat and had the sort of road tires you find on a touring bike. It wasn’t for racing or mountain climbing, it was for going a long distance on a highway.

Somewhere far away from Kabarker and the image in my head of Josh’s …equipment.

I sighed because looking at the bikes did not really keep me distracted from my thoughts.

Josh was my friend, had been my buddy since fourth grade when we moved here from Oklahoma. I’ve always been small for my age, I’m fifteen and about five-foot-three, and Josh is and has been a big guy. Six-one or so now and maybe 160 pounds.

I don’t even weigh a hundred pounds and haven’t grown any since seventh grade. Josh has always been my shield and protector from the sort of bullies who pick on the smallest kid in the class. In return, I helped him with his homework. The guy can’t spell sith.

My reaction to seeing him naked scared me. I felt like my insides had turned to ice cream, and someone had poured red ants all over me. My face burned, and my chest itched. I thought I might start crying.

I wanted things to be the same as they always were. I left Sierra Boulevard and walked two blocks over to Kern Avenue, a residential area with churches and a few medical offices. I didn’t know what to do. I ended up walking slowly back toward the basketball park. If I came up on it from this side, I could see who was on the court before they saw me.

I desperately wanted to see Josh and talk to him, but the idea also scared the sith out of me. It had been almost half an hour since I ran away, and the feelings I had for Josh were even clearer to me. My heart ached. People died for feeling about someone the way I felt about Josh right then.

I trudged along the shady length of Kern Avenue, so green and cool with overhanging trees and older buildings. Most of Kabarker was newer, browner and dustier. Ahead of me, going in the same direction, I saw a figure I recognized. Chud Fugate. Really, his name was Charles, but he wasn’t a Charlie, a Chuck, a Chaz or a Chad. If you knew him, you called him Chud. Even some of the teachers used the nickname.

Chud had been the center on our JayVee basketball team. He was tall, with long arms, seldom missed a free throw, and had an uncanny ability to know who was free to receive a pass. Okay, he wasn’t fast, he couldn’t do a layup, and his dribble got in the way of his feet, but he took up a lot of room on the court, and as an outside shooter, he wasn’t half bad.

Opposing players were often intimidated by his size. Especially if he snarled at them. But he wasn’t a bad guy at all. Kind of shy, friendly if he wasn’t making a game face, and a little funny cause you didn’t know what he might be about to say.

I’d forgotten that he lived on Kern Avenue. His dad was a minister in one of the churches. He was probably headed to the basketball court, too. I wasn’t sure I wanted to overtake him, but even walking slow, I probably would. Chud didn’t do anything quickly.

I had a lot of thinking to do, and continuing efforts to distract myself kept getting in my way. It was obvious that my feelings for Josh had been taking an increasingly alarming direction for some time. But what could I do about it?

All of the things I knew I wanted to do would just make matters worse. Now that I was aware of how I felt…. Seeing him naked with a hard-on was like what I’d always supposed taking drugs would be like. Mind-blowing.

Oop!

First of all, there was the size. His size. I didn’t get a hard-on very often, and…and never like that! Nearly a foot long, it looked to be. Okay probably not. Maybe three times my size in length times girth? Maybe four? I tried not to compare such things, but I knew I was built small. On the basketball court, I made my small size into an advantage.

But thinking about Josh’s physical being was having some weird effects on me. I thought I might be getting a hard-on myself, and my chest itched, my face burned….

I looked up and discovered Chud standing right in front of me. The big guy looked confused.

“What are you doing here, Robin?” he asked. “Don’t you live on Aviation Way? You should be coming from the other side of the park. And where’s your bike? And your ball?”

I shrugged. “In the back of the shops. Josh was sleeping in. I didn’t want to wake him up, so I took a walk.” I started around Chud, who was still blocking the sidewalk.

“Huh,” he said. “You two are practically joined at the hip, most of the time.” He sort of leaned to one side, so he was still in my way. He grinned at me as if what he had said were funny.

I felt my face burning, and I stepped onto the grass to continue around the big lump he made in the universe. “Just…. Don’t…” I said, and my voice went up like it does. My voice hadn’t changed yet, but stress made me a bit squeaky.

He gave me room to get back on the sidewalk by stepping onto the inner grass himself. “Lover’s spat?” he asked. “Josh taking someone else to Prom?”

He was still grinning, not scowling. I realized he was just joking, but something in my expression caused one of the trained badgers he used for eyebrows to arch its back. “Hey?” His grin got a bit wider. “Did you two really have a fight?”

“No,” I managed to say. “I haven’t even talked to him.”

Chud snorted. “You went up to his bedroom and caught him jerking off?”

“Crap,” I muttered, not loud enough to be heard. All the wind had gone out of me. It got quiet.

He swung in beside me, walking on the grass and letting me have the sidewalk. “I bet you saw his dick, and it scared you.” His jaw moved like he had found a forgotten gumball. “He’s like a Mack truck down there. More like a Peterbilt.”

I was ahead of him now. I thought my head might explode. I turned and punched him just above where a human would have a navel.

“Ugh,” he said mildly. I knew how to throw a punch, but it might have been a butterfly’s kiss for all he seemed to feel it. His expression changed a bit to show that mean face he used to intimidate opponents on the court.

I turned and ran again. I’d just hit Chud, the biggest guy in school. I knew I could outrun him, though, so I took off.

“Hey!” he said, only a little louder than his grunt. “Are you telling me this was the first time you’d seen it? We’ve all been in gym class together for, like, half a year?”

His laugh followed me, but I kept running.