“Stop giggling,” Jake told me.

Pete's Vagina
75. Substitution
Erin Halfelven

Coach Wilson put me back in after two more plays. When I complained about the delay, he said, “You’re almost half of our offense, even if you are defensive team co-captain. I’ll use your skills where I think I most need them, Petersen. Is that clear?”

“Uh, yes, sir,” I agreed. Coach never calls me Petersen unless he is mildly chewing me out, so I guess I got told.

“Good,” he said, taking a bit of sting off with a grin. We talked while we stood there on the sidelines. “Their quarterback is going to throw another pass on third down. He’ll throw to whoever is nearest his two o’clock position. I’m going to put you in, and you are going to knock down that pass, or even better, intercept it. You’re quick and they ain’t familiar with the way you can move.”

That sounded good, but my appreciative chuckle came out a bit high. “How do you know this, Coach?” I asked.

“I watched the films your boyfriend took of the Wolves in two other games. Their QB has a pattern.”

I glanced at Lee, who made an OK sign. This time, I know I giggled.

“Get ready, Pete,” said Coach. “We stop them here on the 40, they’ll have to punt on fourth down.”

I pulled my helmet on and moved toward the line. “Seventeen in for 31,” Coach told his assistant, who kept the game logs. I ran out, touched knuckles with Jake and Luther, and trotted on to my spot in the backfield.

Coach had made a couple other substitutions, but we were set when the Wolf center hiked the ball. Luther may have hurried the passer a bit, but he fired a bullet low and short to his tight end. I had to hustle to get there, and the ball stung my hands as I yanked it out of the air.

I landed, already running and turned the right way. I dodged a Wolfbite, and damn! Suddenly, Jake was there, blocking for me. No one got close, and we had a 58-yard run for a touchdown and first blood.

I hopped up and down in the endzone a couple of times, and Jake laughed that big laugh of his that you know he can feel down to his toes. Jake did a dive for our conversion, and then we trotted back toward our forty, and every Wolf we passed glared at us. I felt good but kept my head down so they couldn’t see me grin.

“Stop giggling,” Jake told me, then pointed toward Wilson, who was clearly waving a hand at me.

“Damnit,” I snarled. I ran toward him, signaling with body language that I wanted to be on the field for our second kickoff. He shook his head, pointing to the bench. I reached him, pulling my helmet off. Before I could start arguing, he told me to sit down.

“And shutup,” he added. “There’s no whining in football.”

Ouch. I shut up.

He relented. “Good job, Pete. But now that they’ve seen your speed and broken-field running, we want them to forget about you.” He waved vaguely. “This part is going to be Luther and his boys trying to grab some werewolf hide.”

Werewolves again. I shrugged and sat down on the bench, accepting a paper cup from our waterboy. Lee winked at me and mimed running. We traded grins, and he waggled his eyebrows. “Had a good angle,” he shouted at me. “Wait’ll you see the highlights.”

I wondered if that meant he had been shooting my ass again. I sent him a warning look, but he ignored it.

The Wolves’ return came deep, and Luther stopped the ball carrier on our 35, but they wasted their chances, losing ground on recovering their own fumble. Third down. Would their QB follow a pattern? Was I going to get to come off the bench and play again?

Not this time. The QB threw one away, and then they obviously planned a punt. I glanced at Coach, but he shook his head.

After the punt, we had the ball, and I expected to go in on offense.

Coach shook his head, and glaring at him did no good at all.

Ned Feuer and Evan Moore sat down heavily, one on each side of me. They were two of our biggest juniors, and they looked winded.

“Man,” said Ned. “Those guys talk some shit.”

“Yeah,” Evan agreed. “They called us Pussies.”

“Like we haven’t heard that before,” I pointed out.

“They said we had a team of girls,” said Ned.

“Just one, I told them,” said Evan. “And she ran for a touchdown.”

I grinned. “What’d they say to that?”

“Nothing really, but I don’t think they believed me.”

“It’s been all over the league,” protested Evan. “Everyone knows Gayle is our number 17.”

I shook my head, grinning.

Ned continued. “They saw you run to the lockers as a cheerleader and come back in a football uniform.”

Joanna’s showmanship.

“They think it’s some kind of trick.”

“Well, it’s Halloween tomorrow,” someone else put in from the other end of the bench. On the field, Upsteen’s long arms pulled in a pass, but he only got about five yards before he went down under a pile of fur. When he got up, he walked around for a bit, shaking it off.

“That one guy, #31 for the Wolves, he gave Ups a shot in the ribs.”

“Ref didn’t see it, so no call.”

Wilson spoke to a ref, then to Ups, and glared at the Wolves in general.

I fidgeted. Coach walked up to me. “You’re in, Pete,” he said. “These guys are big but not as slow as they look.” He sent another sneer their way. “They play dirty, so watch yourself.”

“Sure, coach,” I chirped, suddenly cheerful. I was here to play football.

“Run their legs off,” Coach suggested, tapping me on the helmet as I passed.

“Just the thing,” I agreed.

I trotted up to Jake, and we huddled. “32-21-14” he called, one of my favorite plays. He would pretend to be passing but handoff to me. Simon at guard and Dave playing fullback would open a hole for me, and I would run as far and fast as I could. This play depended on quick precision and Jake’s ability as a convincer.

Just before we took positions he whispered to me, “If you get out in front, don’t run away from them. Make them chase you.”

“Got it,” I said. As we lined up, Dave motioned me to widen my position to give him room to move up.

“Hike,” said Jake. He took the snap and raised his hand to fake a throw, but I already had the ball. Simon, Matt, Dave and Ups hit the werewolf line, opening a beautiful hole, and I ran through it, nothing but turf and the Wolfman wearing #31 between me and another score.