Thursday, New Year’s Day, was a holiday in Portugal. I had almost expected that they would all just go back to work given the paucity of their Christmas arrangements. Maybe it is wise that it is a day off as the party went on well into the night. As was getting to be a bit of a habit, we got up late, exercised, breakfasted and wandered out around midday into a city that was still buzzing with a variety of acts performing in every square that we passed. Now I knew why they don’t do Christmas well; they keep all the fun for New Year.

About mid-morning a text arrived in from Lorena:

Rocco, Rua Ivens, 8PM.

Looks like we’re going upmarket.

After a pleasant, relaxed, day just strolling around taking in the sights and soaking up the atmosphere we went back to the apartment to get ready. I would wear the sequined shift dress that Janet had bought for me, with the rose quartz tights that I’d brought with me from home. If the look works, don’t fix it. Jacinta had brought out a killer LBD, velvety material, short, low cut and ruched around the hips. It showed her off perfectly, not a delicate little thing needing protection, a strong, well-built and very attractive woman. She’d be fighting off men later; I didn’t think she’d try hard to fight off the women though. My P228 went into the safe, but Jacinta had brought out a Walter PPK in .22LR which fitted nicely into her dress purse. I’d have to get one of those for myself.

We were the first to arrive. We were shown to our seats and settled back enjoying a beer while we waited. The girls arrived shortly afterwards and our greeting hugs probably raised a few eyebrows at the nearby tables. The girls were apparently planning another interesting evening. The meal was excellent and we were all getting to know each other better. I already knew that they were both involved in publishing for the same magazine, my job had been easy enough to explain, without mentioning that I was working for the state security organs. Jacinta described herself as a civil servant, not exactly a flattering description in a country famed for bureaucracy!

The club later provided some amusement as a group of guys attempted to pick us up, professing to be footballers. They weren’t put off when we identified ourselves as two couples; as well as being somewhat drunk, they were from the not inconsiderable section of the male population who believed that all lesbians can be converted, given the right circumstances, which they would, of course, provide. Eventually we shook them off, but did make sure that they weren’t following us as we left. One of the things which I was starting to understand was that women, whatever their persuasion, lived in a more dangerous world than men. Of course Adelaida and Lorena didn’t know that Jacinta was carrying the great equaliser.

This time we returned to our (did I just say our?) apartment and at some stage, following on from a question about Jacinta working out, she ended up being pinned to the floor by Adelaida and Lorena, (her own fault, she effectively challenged them), a situation I was quick to take advantage of! With three enthusiastic attendees, I think she hit more highs than an opera singer.

January 2nd was on Friday and I was surprised that Jacinta did manage to get in contact with her Superintendent. The call went relatively well in so far as he did not reject any of my conditions but did not expect to have a definitive answer until at least Wednesday the following week. Jacinta wasn’t displeased; it extended her time in Lisbon. We did the tourist bit for the four days but desisted from clubbing on the Tuesday night as we would probably need clear heads on Wednesday. I did prepare the ground with the military by calling my Battalion OC, explaining my situation to him and leaving him to make arrangements with the Military HR Section. He foresaw no problems but would need time to confirm the arrangements.

We also did some planning of our own. If I was going to go back in the role proposed I wanted to move as soon as possible but this would be dependent on the police both having appropriate surveillance in place and getting my apartment door changed. Jacinta would have to be there when this was being done. The lease on the Lisbon apartment would not expire until June; it could be used as a temporary location for other witnesses in the meantime. I suspected that the Witness Protection Team would probably use it as a short term holiday location for themselves if it wasn’t put to any more worthy use. We would also have to let the PSP know that I was, at least for the time being, no longer residing on their patch.

Jacinta’s phone rang at 10am on Wednesday; she recognised her Superintendents number.

“Hi, Detective Beirne here.”

She listened for a minute then, as we had agreed, proposed that I join the call. The Superintendent agreed and she put the phone on the table between us.

“Hi Jos, I’m Superintendent John Smyth. I’m in charge of the proposed operation.”

So, I’m back to being Jos with the police; Jacinta always called me Jesse.

“I’d like to thank you in the first instance for considering our proposal. It’s not something that we would normally do with a civilian, but your military training and rank puts you in a different category. We’ve been discussing the points you made in relation to this operation and I think we’re able to agree generally with those that are in our control.”

“I presume the one not in your control is the military activation?”

“Yes; we’re waiting for the Department to revert on that.”

“If you want to short-circuit that, talk to my OC, coincidentally also Smith, LtCol Harry Smith. I’ve spoken to him already and he’s talking to the HR people. I’ll text your number to him if that’s OK?”

“Thanks, do that. My name is spelled with a Y.”

Smyths are always fussy about that; they don’t want to be mistaken for mere Smiths. Time to nail down the other points so as not to rely on vague assurances.

“Just to confirm Superintendent, I will need to be kept fully aware of the threat environment and in particular of any specific threat, such as a date, definite plan, that sort of thing.”

I could not include Jacinta in my reiteration as it would appear to be negotiating with her superior officer in relation to her job: That would really rile him.

“Of course; we’ll be in constant contact with Detective Beirne and will keep her fully up to date.”

I took this as meaning that she would tell me; I didn’t need to pursue this as I felt that we would work it out between us.

“As the military will be paying my salary, they will have to have first call on my availability for state cyber security work.”

“I’ve told the Cyber Security team; they’re not best pleased but don’t really have any choice.”

Of course not; Supt. Smyth wasn’t responsible for Cyber security so this wasn’t any skin off his nose.

“And finally, how will we know that it is safe to go back to normal living and terminate the protection?”

“If nothing’s happened for three months, no attempt, no specific hit planned, it’s likely that the operation will have to be wound up.”

“Three months seems very short to me. The Kingstons may have more patience that you think.”

“How about we review at three months? We don’t have to just stop everything at once. We could, for instance, extend the close protection while we wind down other aspects of the operation in the background, then taper the security off as the threat diminishes.”

“Can I hold the option of reverting to Lisbon for six months if I’m not happy with your threat assessment?”

“No problem.”

I looked over at Jacinta to see if she wanted to take over the call; she nodded.

“What timeframe are we working to, Sir? Jesse, I mean Jos, would like to get started as soon as possible.”

“We’re pretty much ready now. We have our surveillance in place; we just need to task the team specifically in relation to this plan. We’ll get Jos’ apartment sorted in a matter of days once you’re back. The holdup is the military agreement.”

“OK; I’ll look up flights as soon as we’re done here.”

I made a face; I knew that she’d be able to get a flight the following day so I’d be temporarily on my own again. The Superintendent was wrapping up the call.

“OK; that’s pretty much it: Anything else?”

Jacinta responded first:

“No! I’m OK.”

“I’ll sent your number to my OC and tell him it’s urgent.”

“OK; we’re done.”

He rang off. We were both busy for the next twenty minutes by which time I had texted my OC and Jacinta was booked on a flight home. Then, as it was a reasonably pleasant day, we headed off for a walk in the park.

“Will you be out again before I go back?”

“Probably not; why?”

“Would it make sense for you to be seen coming home with me?”

“Maybe; I’ll have to think about that.”

We walked on a bit.

“Jacinta?”

“Yes?”

“Just how I’m thinking now, when this is over, Jos might disappear for good.”

“What’s making you think that now? Going back to live full-time as a man?”

“Yep; I’m not looking forward to it at all. Look, this is how I’m feeling right now; I might have a different viewpoint in a few months’ time.”

“What about your parents? If you were to go on as Jesse, what would you tell them?”

“I don’t know; I really don’t know. I’ll have to have made a clear decision before I say anything to them.”

We walked on in silence again. This time it was Jacinta who broke the silence:

“Jesse?”

“Yes?”

“You asked me once if I was Bi; I said definitely not.”

“I remember; you effectively told me that you didn’t see me as male.”

“And asked whether you would rather come back as a female.”

“And I know now that I would; being born a female would have eliminated a lot of difficult decisions. But why raise the Bi question? Are you reconsidering?”

“Not exactly; I’m definitely not Bi in the conventional sense…”

She paused, searching for the words… I filled in…

“Is it that you have an exemption for trans women, even if not fully transitioned?”

“I’m not even sure of that; it might only apply to you. You’re the only person in that category that I’ve met, at least knowingly. And I know that Adelaida and Lorena both saw you as a member of the sorority, or were at least prepared to overlook the obvious.”

“Are we both confused?”

“Definitely!”

We walked a bit more. My turn to break the silence:

“I know that you need to go back, but I will miss you.”

She moved close and put an arm around me; I reciprocated.

“I’ll miss you too; but you’ll be home soon.”

It all sounded very domestic!

*****************************
Jacinta was away at mid-morning and we expected that I would probably be heading back in about two weeks. I contacted Isabel, the Intendente assigned as my liaison in the PSP, saying that I’d be going away for a while and would let her know the time of departure and when I would be returning. I didn’t say that I didn’t expect to be back. I’d leave that for the protection team.

The Military HR office confirmed my activation, commencing immediately, and I started to extricate myself from any new or longer term police projects. It also meant that I would start to be paid immediately. I called Janet:

“Hi, how was Christmas?”

“Good, and yours?”

“Actually, in retrospect, very good, though I didn’t expect it to be. I might be home soon?”

“Who’s coming; Jos or Jesse?”

“Jos, though I’ll bring Jesse along as well. Looks like it’ll be safe for me to resume my life soon.”

“How come? Is there word that the bad boys won’t try to get you?”

I hated lying to her, but she didn’t need to know, couldn’t be let know, the real story.

“No, but the police think they’re almost finished, wouldn’t be able to organize a hit anymore.”

“And you believe them?”

“Unless something happens to prove the contrary; I want to go home. Two things, though."

“Go on.”

“I will stay away from your place for a while, just in case the police are wrong.”

“Pity, and the second thing?”

“Remember Jacinta, the policewoman that was collecting Jesse’s stuff when I was leaving?”

Something in my voice must have alerted her.

“Don’t tell me! Ye’re an item?”

“Yeah! Just don’t broadcast that she was in the police.”

“Was? Why?”

“The police aren’t very happy about her: Apparently having an affair with a witness is not regarded as appropriate! She’s going to work with me for a while to see if she’s into cyber security, then maybe take a course. It’s not a state secret or anything; it’s just easier for her all round.”

“Hmmm, ok.”

I could tell that she didn’t fully believe me.

“Speaking of work, are you back in the game fully?”

“Yeah. You did say in the game, not on the game? Is there much going on?”

“Plenty. Everyone’s scared shitless about AI Hackers and trying to make themselves invulnerable. I’m happy to pass back a few of your old clients if you can take them on? I’m snowed under.”

“Thanks, that would be great. I was going to go poking around to get some clients, but this suits a lot better.”

What goes around comes around: We had passed clients and work over and back since we set up our separate businesses. We chatted for a while and I promised that I would let her know when I got home.

After some thought, I decided to pack almost all my clothes and toiletries; I didn’t know if I would be coming back to Lisbon. I kept just enough for the two weeks that we reckoned I’d left before I departed. It transpired that it was cheaper to send the rest back by UPS courier service, to be picked up in the safe house that I’d stayed in before leaving for Portugal. I also took the time to call each of the small circle of friends that I had made and tell them that I was going away for a while to fulfil a contract that had to be delivered on the client’s premises. If I was to come back, I didn’t want to have to explain a sudden absence.

Jacinta and I talked every few days. Things were taking shape; the new door was fitted to my apartment, the camera system was upgraded from the jury-rigged system that previously operated and, most importantly, my return was being orchestrated. A crime reporter was primed with a story of my return with my “partner” which she would drop into a story on the generally improving organised crime situation as the police tightened down on the Kingstons. A few days later a freelance photographer would provide a photo of us in a supermarket carpark. To make the story work, Jacinta would come out to Lisbon and fly back with me. Time to call my parents; my father answered:

“Hi, how are you?”

“Ah, we’re fine. You know yourself, not much going on this time of year. And you?”

“I’m good. I’m coming home.”

“When, for how long?”

“We’re coming back in a week or so, full time we think.”

“Full time? Who’s we?”

“We is me and my girlfriend, partner, whatever. And yes, full time. The police think that it’s safe now.”

I could hear some talking in the background. He must have had the speaker on with my mother overhearing our conversation.

“Who’s this girlfriend; you never mentioned her before.”

“Well, don’t tell anyone this, but she used to be in the police. We kept it quiet because we didn’t want the police to know we were seeing each other, but they know now anyway.”

This was a delicate, calibrated deception. Whereas we were not going to overtly state it, it might come out that Jacinta was “formerly” in the police and it would seem strange if I hadn’t divulged it to them. It also gave a good reason for why I’d never mentioned her before this.

“And is she still in the police?”

“No; she left and is working with me for a while now. Her name is Jacinta”

I didn’t clarify whether “working” was past or future tense.

“And will we get to meet her?”

“Yes; I’ll bring her with me when I call down.”

“We’d better get the spare room ready so.”

“No need, she’ll be fine with me.”

Being old-fashioned, they really didn’t approve of that kind of thing!

“And you’re sure all’s safe now? We’d like to see you, but wouldn’t want you taking any chances.”

“Oh, I won’t be taking chances.”

“Right so; I suppose we’ll be seeing you soon.”

“Yes, and remember, don’t be telling people that Jacinta was in the police.”

They probably wouldn’t anyway; in their world police are generally regarded as useful at times but best kept at a distance.

Jacinta came back out for two days before we were to head back. We met Adelaida and Lorena for dinner, to say goodbye, our treat, otherwise we kept to ourselves. On the day that we were flying home, I had to become Jos again. I regretfully selected simple earrings, leaving my preferred danglers in their box in my case. Make up was abandoned except for BB cream and some undereye concealer. I wore high-waisted, plain, ladies jeans, they even zipped up on the “male” side, with a shirt and my sole male coat. I felt awkward, obvious, like I felt my first time out dressed as a girl.

Then, off to the airport. We put our pistols into our hold luggage in the PSP office and said goodbye to Isabel who had come to the airport to see us off. I thought that this was a nice gesture; we had barely spoken since I’d arrived in Lisbon last Spring and this was her first time meeting Jos. We were well into the flight when Jacinta reached over and caught my arm.

“You OK?”

“Yes; why?”

“You haven’t said a word since we boarded. Nervous?”

“No, not at all. I’ll miss Jesse; I’ve become used to her.”

She gave me a quick nuzzle.

“Oh, I’m sure she’ll visit from time to time.”

We landed and passed through Passport Control; Jacinta had brought out Jos’ passport and put Jesse’s into her hand luggage just in case I made a mistake. The Immigration official did look twice; my hair still had a feminine style and at best I looked androgenous. Once we’d collected our cases we had to drag them into a disabled toilet where we could open them to retrieve our pistols. We picked up the car that Jacinta had left in the airport; it was a grey 4x4 Audi Q5, quite a machine. It was designed for undercover police work with a radio hidden in the glove compartment and hidden shelves under the front seats for holding weapons bigger than pistols. Hopefully we wouldn’t need these!

“Will I drive?”

I wondered how the car would handle. I liked fast cars but didn’t get much of an opportunity to drive them.

“Not now; but we’ll have to work out our preferred roles.”

We got in and drove off. We were going to pick up my pre-delivered luggage at the safe house before going to my apartment. I opened the driving debate:

“If you’re driving, you won’t be able to return fire or use your pistol.”

“True, but normally close protection involves driving the protectee. We’re trained how to react if ambushed in a car. Anyway, you’re armed as well.”

“Won’t it get a bit tedious, always having to drive? And it will look like you’re my minder if it’s always you driving.”

“Hadn’t thought of that… maybe we should alternate so…”

That sorted, I relaxed and started to snooze… no chance… she was driving really fast and in a bus lane to get past traffic.

“Jacinta, you’ll blow our cover!”

She dodged back into the lane of traffic; the car behind furiously blew its horn.

“Sorry, old habits. Now they’ll think I’m just a standard asshole.”

The rest of the drive was slow, boring, tedious, and safe!

We arrived at the safe house and entered through the locking system. I recognised the guys on duty: I’m not sure if they recognised me. They had never met Jos, only Jesse, and the UPS delivery had been in Jacinta’s name. We loaded the box into the Audi and drove off again: We were at my apartment in about half an hour. Jacinta parked in my allocated space and we started to bring the cases up. Of course, we ran into Tom, my landing neighbour. I introduced Jacinta as my partner and confirmed that I was back for good. Eventually, everything safely deposited in the apartment we headed out for a pizza. One of the benefits of being the quarry in this game was that we had a considerable eating out allowance as we were to make sure that I was visible for a few weeks at least in the event that anybody was looking to find me.

Eventually, back in the apartment, I texted Janet and my parents to let them know that I was back. I got into a nightie and fell into bed, to be dragged back out by Jacinta. New nighttime routine: Scan the cameras; lock the buffalo-proof door; alarm on; check pistol is safe and ready on the bedside locker; kiss partner goodnight; then sleep…

And we needed to develop a new day routine as well. I hadn’t shared an apartment with a partner in quite a while, other than easy-to-accommodate, short -term arrangements. At least I had the spare bedroom turned into a combination of office, walk in wardrobe and general storage area so that would give her most of the living area to herself when I was working. I reckoned that it was important to stay out of each other’s hair as much as possible if our mutual tolerance was to last as long as the danger period.

I also decided that I would live as Jesse except when we had to leave the apartment. There were two main reasons: I wanted to live as Jesse, and I also thought that this was essential for my relationship with Jacinta.

As it was now the end of January, the weather was as usual cold and damp so outdoor exercise was limited; I needed to get back into a gym before I seized up. My old gym was happy to take me back, even though there was a waiting list, and also my “new partner”. The fact that I had gone into witness protection was public knowledge and they were prepared to accommodate me. Jacinta and I would have to go together and figure out how to conceal pistols while exercising. Showering afterwards would have to wait until we got home.

The story of my return broke after two days as the crime reporter filed her story for her publication. Once aware that it was on-line, I texted my parents and Janet; we expected the story to be taken up by the morning news shows as well as being in the print versions of the publication (who actually reads these nowadays?) and I wanted to warn them. Both had the same reaction; was this not dangerous for me? Of course I reassured them that I wouldn’t have come home if the Kingstons still represented a danger.

But the Kingstons took the story to heart. On day eight Jacinta came into my office cum general purposes room with some bad news; the contract on me had been reissued and doubled. I should be flattered; I was now worth about half the value of my apartment. The trouble was that this news had come from the street, not the surveillance on the Kingstons. Either the street talk was wrong, or the surveillance was, at least, not fully effective. I decided not to challenge Supt. Smyth-With-A-Y about this; it would only cause him to pull back on, or sanitise, the information that he was prepared to pass on, but it made the whole enterprise appear to be much too risky. Jacinta and I might have to rely on our own vigilance to stay safe now.

Neither Jesse, Jos nor Jacinta were very happy about this!