please put a penny in poor Maddy's hat, if you haven't got a penny, a ha'penny will do, if you haven't got a ha'penny, may the Gods bless you.

This time of year has long been difficult for me. For pretty much all of my adult life it's been a pretty much solo affair, i never got to spend it with my daughter, sometimes with my parents but with them now gone, well its just me again. I always try to have some sort of 'special' meal but there is little joy in preparing everything to sit down alone to eat it, much like drinking alone, i'd advise against it. And then of course, there's the costs, not just the food, gifts, cards, seasonal treats, it quickly adds up and when you are already on the bean line, well something has to go.

And so i was 'looking forward', to a very lean festive season, not for the first time of course. A fairly late change in plans has changed things, Aunty Bev will be at home next Thursday and last night fetched the mekkin's for a celebratory meal which i will get to share as cook. Thank's Bev, i literally wouldn't be here without you.

Financial insecurity has been a constant most of my life, every time i thought i had it cracked it's been pulled out from under me, you can't save for a rainy day (or anything else) when it's already raining. My expectations are low, i do my best to live within my means but even a small unexpected expense like Friday's bike shop visit, will put a hefty spanner in the works.

The point of this diatribe? I'm not sure there is one other than a hope that you all have somewhere to go, folks to be with, food to eat at this often difficult time of year. Be thankful for what you do have and if that's not much, well just know that you are not alone.

So what have i been up to this week? Well not a lot, my tentative plans to visit a couple of UK Christmas markets have been abandoned so its same ole, same ole agenda. Monday was a damp walk along the Frome and yesterday was a ride down to Bath, both got me out of the house but neither brought me much joy. I have started the next Gaby chapter - i'll be cracking on with that today, i'll have a short walk first, its damp again so not far.

I'll be back at the weekend but for now,
Ciao,
Madeline Anafrid