so, my car's windshield wiper fluid distributor seems to be on the fritz, and my check engine light is on. which means bye bye more of my emergency money..
I'm pretty sure whatever is wrong happened when I accidently went over a high sidewalk, so it's nobody's fault but mine.
Sighs, I'm seriously tired of being a fuck-up, and right now I'm struggling with feeling like everybody around me would be better off without me.
Comments
I have felt that many times,
I have felt that many times, and everytime I do, I realize that it's when I'm doing the most good to other people.
I don't think anyone here would consider you a f***-up, and I really don't think you should either. You're a wonderful lady with a good heart. Whatever you do, Dot, don't sell yourself short.
Hugs!
Rosemary
Big Hugs...
You are wrong... The world would be a very sad place without you in it.!!!
Big Loving Hugs tmf
you are not the only one
about 7 mo's ago i f--kedup and had to get a new car side mirror that cost $400, our bodies are getting older and do not handle stress as well as used to, so have to make adjustments like going slower and being more aware of surroundings. being hard on yourself increases the odds of making a mistake. good luck and know you are in the same boat as the rest of us.
Cars
Cars are much too complicated anymore. The windshield washer could be an easy fix, like finding a hose came unhooked or the reservoir is empty. Many auto parts store will read your car for free, it might be something simple and not too expensive to fix but you won't know until the car is scanned.
We all mess up from time to time and wouldn't be human if we didn't. Hope you can work through the sad part and stick with us.
NO!
I suppose it's theoretically possible that everyone may be better off than you, but better of without you??? NEVER!!!
Look, whatever happens to you everyone around you values you. Perhaps it seems they don't value you enough, but they do value you. One of the things we, as human beings, are guilty of is failing to tell those we love that we do love them and value them. Somehow we feel that they should know that... that it goes without saying. So please cut them, and yourself, a break and assume that you are of value, that you are loved.
Think of your daughter. Would she really be better off without you? Not on a bet.
My father died in 1982. I can tell you first hand, I'm not better off without him. There are days right now, that I wish I could call him and just say, "Hi". That when I'm dealing with a sticky home repair problem, or something to do with my car that I could call him and pick his brain.
Even your ex wouldn't be better off without you. With what you write about her, I can tell that you are an asset to her. Then consider your church. How many times have they shown you that you are valued. How many times have they wanted you to share something you wrote or experienced? They value you.
Please Dorthy, don't put yourself down. You are created in God's image, he made you. Remember,
Hugs
Patricia
Happiness is being all dressed up and HAVING some place to go.
Semper in femineo gerunt
Ich bin ein femininer Mann
I would like to give you a piece of advice.
A few years ago I lost part of my left leg in an accident. After my rehabilitation I had become addicted to pain killers. My husband spotted the signs and got me into a 12 step program. During my first weeks my sponsor (Jake) gave this very sage advice. "Jessica you have heard that Murphy is an optimist. That is all well and good. though you need to remember one thing. Keep laughing as life is the greatest practical joke. one played on us poor dumbass humans by a God with a twisted and fucked up sense of humor. We get the punch line in the grave." I've lived by those words for the last few years. Take every day one at a time and always laughing at the joke that the Gods and Goddesses have played on us dumb humans. They take all of our plans and turns them upside down for their pleasure. always looking for a way to make us appreciate the people we have in our lives.
May the peace and happiness of the Goddess keep and protect you
as always your humble outlaw
Jessie Wolf
I'll 'see' your high sidewalk, and 'raise' you ...
I'll 'see' your high sidewalk, and 'raise' you ...
an office chair...
at 50 mph ...
in the middle if an expressway ...
The driver ahead of me changed lanes in time to avoid it, but left me zero time to safely avoid.
I thought it was pretty funny, that the chair managed to punch a hole completely through my licence plate. I kinda stopped laughing when I found out that it also 'took out' the engine cooling radiator, and my A/C heat exchanger. That was $2,000 ago.
Later, I was leaving a grocery store parking lot ... except that what I thought was an exit driveway ... was a parking space, complete with a bumper-high bumper ...
So the remains if my now doubly-shattered front bumper are held on by a rope. Until my most recent driving adventure.
Entering the expressway, I must have 'clipped' some minor road debris. Followed instantly by some grinding and scraping noises ... and >no< safe pullover ...
When I got to a safe place, yep, the bumper. It wasn't any more smashed up, but the rope holding the shards in place had parted. So there I am in 'genteel suburbia', crouching in front of my car, putting on some more rope ...
===
Stuff (or some such "s-word") happens. Most of it is not our fault.
Stick around, Dorothy. How else will you be able to hear about my next adventures ...
===
Seriously, though. Stick around. "Checking out" of this 'hotel heartbreak' is an awfully permanent solution to (usually) temporary problems. And, as my shrink pointed out to me, it leaves all of our survivors seriously messed over.
From my purely selfish point of view, I'd never get to enjoy the stories you have not yet written ... oh, and don't you have some speech or something for your church? I still want to hear (about) it, thanks!
Lessons from Covid
During the last few months, the number of auto accidents have gone way down because people have not been driving as much.
Does that mean it's preferable for people not to drive.
In some cases, yes. But in many instances, the lack of driving also means lack of personal interaction which has left us feeling empty.
The lesson here -- is if you don't bad thing to happen -- don't do anything. Sit in a corner and stare at the wall. Don't talk to anyone. Don't go online.
You make mistakes because you're doing things.
Doing things is much more preferable to sitting in that rediculous corner.
People have often said to me, "If you just hadn't. . .." suggesting that I would be as rich as Midas if I hadn't made one mistake or another.
But if I hadn't been out there trying to do things I wouldn't have had anything to lose.
Turtles can't move if they don't poke their head out.
Don't change. You're one of the sanest and sweetest people on BC.
Jill
Angela Rasch (Jill M I)
Snow
So a couple years back we moved to a nice place here in the mountains. I got back in touch with my inner lumber jack and my inner Mr Plow and a few other very manly, very butch activities. In one particular blizzard my VSO and I got into a discussion which resulted in me shoveling my way out to the truck and then attempting to plow out our driveway and the road while the snow was still coming down at an inch an hour or so.
Long story somewhat shorter. I found myself reviewing life choices while the pickup I was driving was roiling sideways down the side of the mountain. No one was hurt but I have to recommend avoiding situations where the vehicle you are in becomes inverted. I also highly recommend seat belts. And you can pretty much be sure that the insurance will total the truck if it has been upside down.
Three things I hope I learned from that adventure. We will not die from embarrassment. More people live us than we sometimes think. If we don't make mistakes we will never learn anything.
Why do I post this? Because we love you and sharing is caring, and all that other trite bullshit you don't want to hear right now. Come on back when you feel better. You will and most of us will sill be here.
Peace, Love, Grace
Your friend
Crash