Printer-friendly version
Author:
Caution:
Audience Rating:
Publication:
Genre:
Character Age:
Other Keywords:
Permission:
...
If you liked this post, you can leave a comment and/or a kudos!
Click the Thumbs Up! button below to leave the author a kudos:
And please, remember to comment, too! Thanks.
This story is 0 words long.
Comments
it all feels normal.
reminds me of my first attempt to be in the workforce as Dorothy. and the whole awkward thing with Jackson was adorkable
the first chapter
the first chapter was really rough i almost gave up on it im glad i didnt its turning into a really good story keep it up .the conversations between the friends are great
Even the burger.
The descriptions are wonderful. The internal monologue is wonderful. The dialogue is beyond wonderful. Even the BURGER is wonderful. I love this story!
I can’t even identify the part I liked best. Was it the double-trans dialogue, where they are apologizing to each other for exactly the right things, and accepting each other’s apologies and getting past it? Was it the crazy laundromat people (“so much money”)? Was it Toni fretting about having legs? Was it the bartender telling her to dopeslap Steve? Or perhaps the dopeslap itself? All of it was good. Better than good.
I want a burger!
— Emma
I his one added a real twist!
You keep adding new layers, but each level has new people who actually care about each other.
Toni even seems to be getting straightened out at work!
My best approximation for that burger might be a place in Amarillo. I couldn’t eat half of it. But it made a great dinner after I got to my brother’s house the next day.
Gillian Cairns
I his one added a real twist!
You keep adding new layers, but each level has new people who actually care about each other.
Toni even seems to be getting straightened out at work!
My best approximation for that burger might be a place in Amarillo. I couldn’t eat half of it. But it made a great dinner after I got to my brother’s house the next day.
Gillian Cairns
So good . . .
The conversations sound exactly like they would be in the real world.
The anxieties are all exactly as the are in the real world.
I'm loving the story - remembering to keep the time to take in the whole chapter in one sitting because it drags you in so you best get comfortable.
Can I have onion on my burger please and maybe some ranch sauce? Yea. I know, but we're all individuals. . . .
Hugs&Kudos!
Suzi
True Gem
OK Ms W, time to fess up. Where have you been hiding this incredibly good story-telling and writing? Why haven't I run across it before? From the banter of friends over beers to the aching desire of the sensuous first kiss, your writing is stunningly good. And the twist of the central character who is so eager to express her femininity is just plain delicious. I'll read everything you ever write, with great anticipation. Thank you dear, thank you. Rianna in Iowa
No hiding
I've not been hiding anywhere, the message is appreciated though, really! :D I've been writing a few years, now. You can find out a little about my personal story on my BCTS author page, here.
As for the writing, I decided to read back after your lovely comment and there were some obvious flaws in this. Hopefully if I publish all this on Kindle or the like I'll have enough distance from it to correct the language level mistakes. It's the nature of writing and publishing quickly. It's also reminded me of areas where I need to go again and call back to in the story. Which is why I'm taking a break from writing at the moment. Writing just didn't feel fresh — but there's still another 60,000 words of Toni With An i published, as I write this, and about 40,000 words of Allison Zero — and more to come — re-reading has inspired me. I think there's something special to this, at least for me, personally.