Chapter 6

I must have been exhausted from the day, as I slept well until I woke needing a pee. It took me a while to get out of bed, as the nightie had become twisted around my legs, but I managed to get into the bathroom without exploding. I sat on the seat in an automatic movement, even though I wasn’t wearing the special pants. Margaret came in from the other door as I was finishing.

“Good morning, Tonya. Don’t try to cover up, it’s just us girls here. When you’ve washed your hands, look in the wardrobe a pick something for today. There’s a couple of choices. I’ll have my shower and then you can have yours while I dress. Then I’ll help you dress after I’ve ordered breakfast.”

I finished what I was doing and wiped the end with a sheet of paper, then stood at the sink to wash my hands as she sat. I went into the bedroom and looked in the wardrobe. There were two skirts. One was a dark blue and pleated, a bit like a school uniform. The other couldn’t be more different. It was dark red, in a shiny material, and I couldn’t take my eyes off it. There was also black satin shirt, quite plain, but I knew that any girl I saw wearing the combination would catch the eyes of every guy around.

I pulled the bed together and took the two items down, laying them on the bed. I would need the corset again to make it work. Margaret came out of the bathroom and looked at what I’d chosen.

“Good girl. You need to be unmistakably girl, today. You’ll need black stockings. There’s a fresh pair in the drawer. Get yourself showered and I’ll be back in a few minutes.”

I showered and dried and went back into the bedroom. I was able to put the special pants on, then I managed to pull the corset on, by breathing in as I heaved. For some reason, the feel of the support of the breasts was comforting. Next was the stockings, which wasn’t as much drama as last night, followed by the only black panties I could find, which were so minimal, I wondered why they had bothered. The shirt felt slippery on my bare shoulders, and the buttons were the wrong way. The skirt came to mid-thigh and the zip was on the side. I put last night’s shoes on and went to look in the big mirror. Except for the lack of hair, I still couldn’t be confused with any boy I’d ever seen. Except for the lack of hair, I looked almost exactly like one of the pictures of Tanya I had seen yesterday.

Margaret came through as I stood there.

“Looking good, Tonya. I’ll call room service and then we’ll get the wig fixed.”

Back in my room, I was sat on the bed as she prepared the wig, with a brush through it, and placed it on my head. She had a tube of something sticky, which she used, moving around my skull and holding the wig band down until it was fixed.

The chain was back on my neck, the watch and bracelet returned to my wrists, and the rings went on my fingers.

‘We’ll leave the studs in, for the moment, so that the piercing can heal. If you keep using drops before the hole has firmed, you end up with oval holes.”

There was a knock on the outer door, and we went into the other room. I opened the door to let the maid in as Margaret made space at the breakfast bar. She had ordered full English for both of us, and we did it justice. We had cleaned our teeth, made up our faces, and checked that the key and address was in my bag when she looked at her watch.

“Good timing, once more, Tonya. We will see Hector down in reception.”

When we got to reception, he was talking to the receptionist.

“Good morning, girls. You both look fabulous. I’ve just told Sue that you can check out whenever you like, this afternoon. When you’re ready to go, bring the vehicle keys to reception and a lad will go and get it for you. There’ll be nothing to pay. Now, where’s the bank?”

“It’s Lloyds, on Oxford Street.”

“That would have been close to where Tanya and Albert were living. They had an upstairs flat on Hanway Street. It’s not far, and we can take the scenic route.”

The scenic part was when we had walked along Frith Street and arrived at Soho Square, where we walked through the square, surrounded by shady trees, grass, and flowers. If it wasn’t for the constant sound of traffic, it could have been a park anywhere. He was carrying a briefcase and looked every inch the successful businessman. On the way, he spoke about me performing in the club. He said that I could do Friday and Saturday nights and stay in Mimi’s. If I brought down the outfits, they would be stored at the club, and I could have a case with day wear being kept for me at the hotel. That meant that I could travel light.

“What sort of money are you thinking of?”

“Two thousand a week, paid into your own account. For that, I would expect you to sometimes come down mid-week, to rehearse with other singers. You would replace the usual accompanist, who wants to retire, and back other acts for the first part of the night, do your set after a break, and then back someone else until the early hours. You’ll be working for the money.”

“If I’m at Mimi’s, can we have a room like the one we now have, so Margaret could make sure I’m presentable? She could help out at the club as a make-up artist.”

“I’ll think that one over. Oh, before we get to the bank.”

He stopped and opened the briefcase, pulling out a photo ID for me. It was a driving license in the name of Antonia Rebecca Hyde.

“That will be good enough for the bank but won’t hold up if you get pulled over. If that happens, this is an Equity card in your real name, with a note on the back giving your AKA. That card is real, and it will be yours to keep when you sign with me. Last night was a success, and you really showed total control.”

Margaret giggled.

“I told her that Antonia would nail it, when she was in front of an audience.”

We carried on as I put the items in my bag. When we got to the bank, I walked up to the ‘help desk’.

“Good morning. About twenty-five years ago, my cousin placed some items in a safe deposit box, intending to pick them up later. Unfortunately, she has died, and I’ve inherited everything, finding this envelope recently. Is there any way I can retrieve the contents?”

“Give me the key, miss, and I’ll check with my manager. After that amount of time, there will certainly be fees to pay.”

He took the key and went into an office. We waited, and, about ten minutes later, one of the older men who had been in the club last night came out with some paperwork.

“Oh! Good morning, Antonia. Mister Parker. That was a magic show last night. The previous manager had told me about this deposit, and to wait thirty years before opening it, unless it was claimed. If I can have an ID, purely to follow the rules, I have a question for you to answer, to confirm your bone fides.”

He looked at the sheet and quoted a song line, asking what came next. I answered it and he smiled. The blond, who he had been at the club with, was waved to come over.

“Julie, could you please take Miss Hyde to the viewing room and bring this box out of the vault. Then copy her ID for the records. Miss Hyde, there are fees accrued.”

Hector spoke.

“I’ll take care of those, sir. Once we’ve confirmed that the contents are what we think they are.”

“Very good, Mister Parker. Julie will type up an invoice when you’re ready.”

The three of us followed the blonde to a small room with a table and a couple of chairs. Hector stood as we sat down. When the box was placed on the table, and the key given back to me, the girl left the room. I unlocked the box and sat back. Hector opened it to reveal a number of named jewellers boxes, and some that were plain. He pulled them all out and lined them up on the table. As he opened the proper ones, even I could tell that the diamonds and emeralds were the real thing. He then opened up the others. Two were empty.

“She must have been wearing the paste when we were raided. They weren’t with her when she was released. That loss isn’t a big problem, they were cheap copies. We have all the real ones, and that’s a win. They were worth about ten thousand when she left, and they’re worth about forty thousand today. Thank you for this, Antonia. I’ll take the good stuff and you girls can keep the paste.”

He closed the boxes and put them into his briefcase. Margaret closed the others and put them in the big bag she had with her. I looked in the deposit box and saw a couple of differently coloured ring boxes. I pulled them out and opened them. One contained a diamond ring, and the other had a gold ring. Margaret looked at them and put her hand on my arm.

“One is an engagement ring, and the other is a wedding ring, They must have considered themselves married. No wonder they stayed together until Albert died.”

I put the ring boxes in my bag, we left the box and the key, then went back to Julie. Hector spoke to her.

“The boxes contained what we expected. Can you give me an invoice for the fees, and I’ll pay that today. The box is no longer needed.”

Margaret and I went outside and watched the traffic while Hector sorted out the account. She linked her arm in mine.

“This world. It’s dog eat dog, grift for a living and the sound of traffic twenty-four hours a day. The only reason we don’t hear it in the hotel is thanks to triple glazing. When you look out the window, it all looks strange. Not like our quiet end of Lower Green. The money seems good, Tonia, but once immersed in the nightlife, there’s no breaks. Oh! There’s adulation, money and your five minutes, or five years, of fame.”

“I know, sis. It’s been a whirlwind of a visit. We got the result for Hector, I got to play in front of an audience, and I recorded some songs. I won’t be signing with his agency, not this time. I want to create a true home at Lower Green, now we have all the answers we were looking for. Hector is basically a good man, but he has an empire to run, and I have the feeling that his keen appreciation of me will only last until I’m on the payroll. Then there’ll be extra work, suggestions that I move here, maybe a tour and living out of a suitcase for three months. I’m a country bumpkin from Stevenage, not some starlet with dreams of the stage.”

“So, sis, what now?”

“Now I avoid signing, have some say about naming the CD, if he wants to release it, take what we’ve gained and go home. So, I’ll have to live as Antonia, but being a woman who can play dance music to an audience is better than being a short barman for the rest of my life. When I was looking around for a job, before I went to the Poachers, I made a list of every pub and club between Stevenage and Luton. There were thirty-five. If only half have live music, that’s seventeen places where I can play. If we go out as far as Bedford, or even Northampton, I could get bookings almost every weekend of the year, and only do any place two or three times.”

“Will you still want me around?”

“Of course I do. That dedication, last night, wasn’t just for show. You may find a nice guy and start a family, and as my manager and makeupologist, you would be seeing a lot more eligible men than working in a salon.”

“It’s cosmetologist, sis. But I like what you’re saying. We don’t have to do things in a rush. We can print flyers and take them around. It will only take one place to have you on to show others what you can do.”

Hector came out of the bank, a big smile on his face.

“Now, girls. What would you like to do now?”

“If it’s all the same to you, Hector, we were just talking about going home.”

“Not coming back to the office to sign?”

“Not this time, Hector. Thank you for the opportunity to play last night and thank you for your kindness. It’s just that this has been our first exposure to the big city, and we’re not sure that we could get used to it.”

“What about fame and money?”

“It’s all very good but look what it did for Tanya. One day, the tide will turn and people like me will become pariahs again. I don’t want to get trapped in this life, not at the moment. I’m sorry if I’ve messed up your plans.”

“Look, Antonia. I appreciate your honesty. If I get that CD that you recorded issued, what do you want to call it?”

“How about ‘Antonia Underwood in a Reflective Mood’ The notes could have Tanyas’ story and that I’m her cousin. You may, with all the new technology, be able to put together an album of duets, using the recordings that you have in storage. It could be ‘Tanya and Tonya sing the blues’.”

His eyes glazed for a moment.

“If I didn’t know who you really are, Toni, I could kiss you. We’ll send you a box of your CDs that you can take around. I’ll also send you the video that our fixed cameras recorded last night. It will be something to show your grandchildren. I’ll stand by my side of the bargain we made, you keep the outfits and the wig, they were worth it to get Dads’ jewels back, and believe it or not, to lay to rest the crush I still had for Tanya. Have a good trip home.”

He gave us both a hug, then walked off, along Oxford Street, without looking back. We went back the way we came, walking through the park and savouring the smell of nature.

“You know, sis, I was still in two minds until he brought us via the scenic route. It reminded me of that line in ‘Big Yellow Taxi’ about putting all the trees into a museum and charging a dollar and a half just to see them. No matter which window we look out of, at home, there are trees almost close enough to touch.”

We walked along Frith Street until we got to the Sussex British Bistro. We went in and found a nice table. We ordered dry whites and sipped them while looking at the menu. It was getting towards noon, so we had a good lunch. I had a huge meal of roast beef and vegetables, while Margaret had a cod wellington, as something she could remember for a long time. We took our time and made the one glass last.

Back at the hotel, I gave the receptionist the car keys and asked for it to be outside in an hour. We carefully packed, me putting my new clothes away. After using the bathroom, we carried our cases down to reception and only had a few minutes to wait before the Defender stopped outside. The lad helped us load up and thanked me for the tip. We checked out and drove away, content in our decision. The biggest difference between now and the last time I had been driving was the fact that I was going home in a short skirt and satin shirt and could look down and see my knees encased in stockings.

There was another difference that was very new. It was the waves and whistles we got as we cruised along. Margaret could hardly stop laughing and her enjoyment was contagious. We were a happy pair driving north and getting happier the closer we got to home.

We were past Potters Bar when I thought about home and all that went with it.

“You’ve gone quiet, Tonya, something on your mind. Regrets, maybe?”

“No regrets, sis. No, it’s just that I thought about going home and several things raised their heads in my mind.”

“Let me guess. One is how we’re going to explain your current appearance, with the others being more heads of the same Hydra. We can hide away until the semi-permanent fades, or else we can face the problem, head on.”

“We?”

“Yes, my talented sister, we. All we do is tell the truth, with a little bit of fictional aspiration. We tell anyone who asks that you were given a treatment to appear female to see the bank. Hector bankrolled the process but went overboard to try and get you playing in his nightclub, without your permission. We don’t have to provide an hour-by-hour timeline. The only question that’s likely to be asked is if you intend to stay this way. From what we spoke about, earlier, you want to be an entertainer called Antonia Underwood. Any other problems I can solve for you with my keen brain?”

“Just one. How the hell do I get out of this car without hitching my skirt and showing the world these ridiculous panties?”

“They’re not panties, doofus. They’re known as a thong. Think that you’re lucky that you have that gaffe on, or else you’d have the stringy back laying in your bum crack. What you do is slightly lift your bum, pull the skirt down as tight as you can, open the door and the swivel with your knees together. Use the door to support you as you slide, gracefully out and onto terra firma. Now, what are we going to do when we get to our neck of the woods?”

“I think we need to see Mum in the library, first. Then she can warn Dad about things. He’ll want me to sue Hector for something or other, but we’ll let sleeping dogs lie, considering that I never complained at the time.”

“OK, Stevenage first, and then what?”

“We stop and pick up the dogs, spending some time with Francis. I think that we should invite her and the other girls to dinner, at home, to give them the full story. I think that they’ll understand Tom more than we think and would appreciate seeing that DVD and the Cabinet of Curiosities. It would also give them more insight to me and my plans.”

“We can let Mum talk to her brother and leave it up to him to call us. Let’s face it, Tonya, there aren’t too many others that will notice that Anthony isn’t around any longer. They’ll certainly notice Antonia when you get out and about.”

We eased onto the slip road as we passed GSK, and it wasn’t far to the library. I followed the advice, which seemed convoluted but worked. It was something to remember when I was in a short skirt again. We went in and found Mum putting books back on shelves. Margaret saw her and called out.

“Hi, Mum.”

“Hello, dear. Back from your trip. Who’s your friend? I can’t remember seeing her before.”

“Hi, Mum. I’m a bit different from the last time you saw me.”

She looked more closely and smiled.

“Oh dear! The curse of the cabinet strikes again. You really do make a striking young lady. What do we call you now?”

“I’m Antonia. Or Tonya, or Toni with an ‘I’. I can explain how this came about. It wasn’t meant to be, honest!”

“Let me put these books away and you can join me in my office.”

We helped to replace the books, and I found out that there was a way to put them in lower shelves that’s particularly female if you’re wearing a short skirt and heels. I noticed Mum looking at me and grinning as I squatted.

In her office, we took her through the reasons, and the process, of me looking like this, and the problem with the make-up. We also told her about being taken for dinner at the nightclub and my performance.

“So, my new daughter, are you moving to London and being a star?”

“No, Mum. I resisted the pull of a couple of grand a week and a lot of hard work. It would only be a finite period, as my ability to pass would diminish after a few years. We’re staying put.”

“I’m proud of you, daughter. Did you get the things in the other deposit box?”

“We did, although they were mainly jewels that Hectors’ father had loaned Tanya. He was able to retrieve all the genuine stuff, and we left with the paste, less the items Tanya had been wearing on the night of the raid. They disappeared while she was under arrest. Will you and Dad come over on Saturday evening? I’ll cook dinner and we can have a long talk. There’s a few things that I’d like to ask him about setting up my own company as an entertainer.”

“That would be lovely, Tonya. Remember to get a nice dress for the occasion and wear an apron when you cook.”

“I already have a cocktail dress, Mum. Hector paid out a lot to entice me to sing for him and didn’t want anything back. We’ll see you about five?”

“We’ll be there, love. I’ll tell Eddy that you’ve now got all the answers, and that you’re following in Tanyas’ footsteps.”

“Thanks. Mum. We need to get the dogs, now, and rearrange my wardrobe. I have a little bit of shopping to get, tomorrow.”

When we left her, I felt a lot better. My parents had been the biggest fear in my mind. We looped around Hitchin and pulled up outside Francis’ home. We both got out and Margaret knocked on the door. Francis opened it, looked at me and laughed.

“My God, Tony. You are the spitting image of Tom at around that age. He was gorgeous as well, when he dressed. You really have to tell me how you left as him and came back as her.”

“I’m happy to reveal all, Francis. Can you get the girls together, one evening. I can cook dinner for us all and give you all the details of Toms’ life when he left. It’s quite a story, and we have things in the house to show you all. My parents will be with us on Saturday, so any other day would be good.”

“I’ll ask around and let you know. It will be interesting to see how the dogs take to you, like this. You do smell much the same, so they should be all right. You’ll have to introduce them to the perfume you choose, when you start wearing it.”

She went to the kitchen door and called for Boo, and two dogs rushed in, dashing up to Margaret and then giving me a sniff before realising who I was. We put them in the back of the Defender and Francis gave us both a hug before we left. When she hugged me, she whispered in my ear.

“You’ve changed, Tony. Not only in looks, but also in your actions. There was something that you learned about yourself in London. I’ll try to get the girls together as soon as I can, as it’s going to be hard to wait to be told all.”

We went the hundred yards to home, getting out the car and letting the dogs out. They raced around the garden with gay abandon. I opened up the kitchen door and went inside, looking around with fresh eyes. Margaret passed me, patting my arm and smiling as she did so. When I had left, this was home, but barely. Now, it was a home that I had chosen over a life of being on stage in London. As I went back to the Defender to collect our luggage, I was really home, and more content than any other time in my life.

Marianne Gregory © 2026