Selecting a Crew

In the morning, we stripped and showered. There was a private bathroom in our room. I went first. Sputty was standing there stark naked and not hiding her body from me in the least when I came out and she went in for her turn.

It was a treat to get to use a real, private shower, even if we knew the water was recycled after enough filtering to let it actually get us clean and ensure it didn’t carry any diseases. Usually, we got exactly one shower during the trip. When we got back to the station after the mission, we removed our space suits, tossed the undersuits and underwear into a quick-wash-and-dry laundry service they had here, and cleaned off the dead skin cells and sweat in a big communal shower. Half an hour later, after much scrubbing and drying off, we would be presented with the same clothes ready to put back on.

I also had a pee for the first time as a girl that morning. Well, for the first time as a conscious girl without a catheter. It wasn’t anything to write home about, nor anything beyond what I expected. Just something I’m going to have to get used to.

We each put on a new outfit of panties and undersuit from those we’d been given and went out to join the others for breakfast. Dunn was there and gave us some more lessons in being women after we finished eating.

Then they brought up the subject of capturing the device that had done this to us. Mr. Greene called us from Earth to beg us to help.

“We’re tracking the object. Its orbit changed after your encounter with it, but it’s in a stable orbit and not likely to collide with anything soon. But that’s not why we want you to get the device. Right now, STM-36 is out there but we aren’t risking another problem like yours. We are keeping them on the opposite side of the Earth from the device, since there is still plenty of space junk to clean up, but we can only do that for so long.”

He paused for a moment. I think he was trying to let a little guilt sink into us.

“Here’s what I’m offering. I need a crew to go out and fetch that thing. That’s one pilot, one arm operator, and one retriever. We don’t need a medic or backup because it’s just the one target; it shouldn’t take more than three hours at the most to travel to and from the thing and catch it. If we get a near pass to the station, it could be as little as half an hour. If you can capture it like you can with the usual space junk, you’ll take it directly to one of the hazardous waste satellites that’s currently empty and will be designated for this one purpose, and people can travel there if they want to study it.”

The hazardous waste satellites were part of the required learning for all crew members, but we usually didn’t have to travel there ourselves. When crew aboard SpaceFab-1 separated the collected objects into radioactive, hazardous, and normal, the radioactive bits were stored in a lead-lined room on the station (but still potentially available for suitably protected customers to buy). Chemicals deemed too hazardous to keep on the station were taken to one of several satellites that carried out automated operations to convert them into safe chemicals by breaking down complex molecules, then essentially burning them to make light gases like carbon dioxide and water vapor. Water vapor was captured through filters that allowed only water to pass through and collected for reuse. Carbon dioxide went through other filters and eventually froze into dry ice. Trace amounts of metals, usually metal oxides at this point, were left behind and would be periodically removed when they amassed to a certain amount.

These hazardous waste satellites were in high orbits, well above the altitude most space junk was at, but they were also isolated from where other ships were likely to travel. Each satellite took a few months to completely process its contents, but they had enough so that usually after one of these missions the next one in line was done. Depositing this object in one that they would presumably turn off just meant they’d skip that one and not use it for anything else.

“If it’s evasive, you have permission to destroy it. I’m offering 5 million dollars to each of the crew who go to either capture or destroy the device, with an extra 5 million apiece if you succeed in capturing and storing the device on one of these stations, so it can potentially be used for good. What do you say?”

Zimmerman spoke up first. “This transformation is beyond my wildest dreams. I don’t want risk encountering the thing again and getting changed back.”

It surprised me that Zim was trans, but thinking about that let me understand Greene’s plan. If we capture the thing for him, he can let trans people pay for flights to the thing and get fully working gender changes. Some trans-women already pay tens of thousands for hormones, surgery, and more for something that only makes them look female. Becoming a fully functioning female in days? Priceless. But he would set a price, of course, say a hundred grand for a short flight to the device, a couple recovery days at SpaceFab-1, and then back down to Earth. He’d add tens of millions a year to what he already makes on this operation, and paying an extra 15 mil to us was just the cost of getting it started. I’m sure he considered the first 15 mil a business expense to keep SpaceFab going, something he had to do because he was contracted to continue cleaning space junk.

Two of the other guys, Ted Baker, a retriever, and Kevin Posey, an arm operator, said they had wives, and Posey had a daughter also. Both said they were sure being a woman was going to make their relationships strange, but also that they believed their wives would support them. So they weren’t willing to undertake the extra danger of this mission, and the extra two million they each were already getting from insurance was enough. Posey specifically said he wouldn’t “risk getting turned into a potato or something.”

Then Sputty looked at me. Apparently afraid I was going to volunteer, she grabbed hold of my arm. “Don’t do it, Robin. I want you to stay safe and protect me.”

And she planted a quick but messy kiss right on my mouth. I guess she wasn’t worried in the least of letting the others know about the relationship we had started. That she had started, anyway. I was just happily going along with it.

So I said, “You heard Sputty. I guess that means we are both out.”

Sputty said, “That’s right, I’m out, too,” and then gave me a longer kiss.

Gardner then said, “I have a wife, too, but she is rabidly anti-gay and anti-trans. There is no chance we can stay together if I stay female. I’ll join your mission as arm operator.”

Reynolds, the smallest one of us, who had also come out with the smallest breasts and looked like a 14-year-old girl now, said, “I’ll go as retriever.”

The two remaining pilots, Michaels and Lemon, both bowed out. And Cardenas, the medic, wasn’t even asked. There wasn’t a role for her in this quick recovery mission.

The last person was Chisholm, the backup, who said, “I can fly your ship.”

The three volunteers were taken away to get briefed on mission plans and everything they knew about the device. The rest of us were released back to our quarters with just a little info on our schedule. The supply ship with our space suits was going to arrive at 10 o’clock GMT tomorrow morning, and the crew would test them and prep for the mission immediately, with intention to head out after the thing at noon. The rest of us civilians would also confirm the fit of our suits, but then be able to watch the mission, as we were going to have a continuous video call going, and we would potentially be there for advice, as crew trained with the same skills they were using.

But there was nothing else to do for now, so this gave me a chance to think about my life with Sputty. I hadn’t ever wanted to be female, but if it let me have a girlfriend who looked like Sputty does now, I was not going to complain.

I asked Sputty, “You wanted me to protect you, so I guess we need to find a home together after we get back. Someplace new?”

“Yeah, I can’t face up to my friends like this. They offered to give us new identities and I’m going to take them up on that. I can live with you, if you have the space, or just somewhere new.”

“I’ve only got a small apartment. I didn’t have much left after breaking up with my ex. She took the kids, the house, and enough of my money that I went on three of these missions to build a proper retirement fund. But with the insurance pay we’ll have more than enough to buy a house anywhere.”

“Somewhere boring. I don’t want to be in the spotlight.”

“We’ll have to see if we can find a way for you to dress so you don’t bring a spotlight anywhere you go.”

“Yeah, I expect we’re both going to be spending some time figuring out clothes,” she replied.

We spent the time until lunch talking about clothes and places we might live. After we all got together for lunch, we socialized with the others who declined to go out on the recovery mission, eight of us in all. Somebody had found two decks of cards, and Posey taught us all cancellation hearts. It’s like regular hearts, but with more players and two decks, and if two of the same card are played on the same trick, neither can win the trick. It was a fun way to pass time, and rather than keep a running score tally, the loser of each hand had to tell us something about themselves. We were strangers before our 10-day mission, and had gotten to know each other a little during the mission, but now we were bonding in a new way due to our shared fate.

A couple of them were pulled away separately for something, so we played some hands with 7 people, for which we added one joker to the deck to make the numbers come out even, with the rule that whoever gets the joker leads it to start the first trick and the second player’s card determines the suit to follow on that trick. A few hands after the last of these returned, the game was halted so all of us not going on the mission tomorrow could discuss our return plans. The doctor introduced us to Jenna Carter, a clerk aboard SpaceFab-1.

Carter explained, “All of you who are married have had a chance to speak with your spouses, and you’re just getting new first names and going back to live with your families. The rest of you can do that if you wish, but you can take whole new identities and move to new places, if you like. Also, it seems like you have all come out of this process looking younger than you did before, though the effect seems to have varied in intensity, so we can reduce your age as well.”

The married ones revealed their already-made decisions first. Ted Baker chose to be called Dora. We decided she looked about 25, but Ted got married at 18 and if we reduced Dora to 25, she would have gotten married when she was 6, so she chose to stay 37.

Kevin Posey chose to be called Keisha. The de-aging effect wasn’t strong with her, so she kept her real age of 39.

The crew’s doctor, Michael Cardenas, chose to be called Michelle. We only learned during the hearts game that she was married, and she hoped to stay with her wife. She was being reduced in age from 47 to 30, though I thought she could have passed for younger. You can only be so young and have a medical degree, I suppose.

Zimmerman chose to be called Chloe Kelly, reduced from 38 to 26 years old, and was going somewhere new within her native Australia.

Sputty shot down some suggestions for where we might live as too much in the spotlight. Some of Sputty’s ideas were discouraged by Jenna as too difficult for us to get along in as a lesbian couple. We finally agreed it would be OK for us to move to Philadelphia.

Sputty, wanting to be as boring as possible, chose to be called Ann Smith. Since Sputty had already named me Robin for my red hair, I decided to go with Robin Smith since Sputty seemed smitten with me, and it would eliminate the question about one of us changing our surname later if we married. Yeah, I was already looking that far ahead, not that I planned on asking her, but because I expected she might ask me.

I was the oldest here at 55 and went with the age of 26 that was the consensus of our group for how I looked now. Sputty was really 34, the second-youngest here, and while the rest of us thought she looked 18, she chose to be 21 so she could drink.

The two pilots who bowed out at the end, Pete Michaels and Bobby Lemon, were going to move in together in New York City, where one of them already had a place to live. They also chose to have the same surname, as Rhonda and Joanna Jacobs, but they didn’t appear to be romantic. They were going to pose as sisters, and apparently wanted to support each other during their unexpected transition to womanhood. They were both in their 40s and divorced, but were each taking 10 years off their ages.

Then, with us together, they discussed clothes.

Carter explained, “While you were unconscious, Doctor Quill took a full set of measurements to order you proper space suits, and we’ve used those to develop a full set of clothing sizes for each of you. Since some of you may not have experience buying women’s clothes at all, and none of you have experience buying them for yourselves, we will also give you some helpful guides along with these size lists once you’re back on Earth. Wherever you land, we’ll have someone find you a normal set of clothes to travel to your new homes in, rather than these undersuits, and we’ll have more clothes waiting for you in your new homes.”

Wherever we land usually meant somewhere in the Pacific. It was the biggest patch of water on Earth for splashdown, but it meant we could end up in any of several countries within it or along its shorelines, but SpaceFab was a global company who could hire people anywhere to pick us up and buy clothes for us. It was thoughtful to give us something to start with, since none of us own any clothing that is likely to fit.

“Those of you who are moving will arrive at apartments we will arrange for you on a month-to-month rental so that you can move into permanent homes when you find something you like, and we’ll provide assistance with home-buying. All of you can also have two years of service from lifestyle coaches to help you choose clothing and deal with other aspects of your transition to womanhood. Any form of mental health treatment you end up needing will also be covered.”

This session ended and we went back to the hearts game until dinner. 

Further Exploration with Ann

At dinner, we saw the volunteers for the recovery mission for the first time since they volunteered, but after dinner, they were taken away again for whatever preparation they were doing. The two pilots who chose to live together also bowed out of the group, and Sputty and I decided to do likewise. I went back to the room I shared with Sputty, or Ann as she now wanted to be known. I tried to use her new name so we’d both get used to it.

“Ann, I can see that you’re smitten with me.”

She gave me a “who, me?” kind of look.

“And you look like a dream girl to me, the kind of woman who I could only have in my dreams. You might think with my body that I could get any woman I wanted, but my male face was kind of ugly. It kept me from getting that sort of woman.”

Ann just looked at me as if not entirely understanding what I was saying.

“But I want to know how far you want this relationship to go.”

“Oh, Robin, I need to tell you something. I never told any of the crew this, but you should know.”

I decided it was probably best for me to be sitting for this, and did so on the edge of my bunk.

Ann said flatly, “As a boy, I was raped.”

“Oh, God, I’m so sorry!”

Ann then couldn’t hold back any longer, and broke out crying, hugging me on one shoulder.

After a good ten minutes, she sat down beside me and continued her story.

“It was a teacher at my school. I was in fifth grade. It happened in a restroom. I reported it, they got the evidence, he went to jail for a long time, and I got counseling. I was able to live a life, but I never dated. With you talking about relationships and dating, it brought back all those memories. It was just something I could never do, and I think it’s our shared experience that makes me feel like I can trust you.”

“I understand why you are acting the way you are, and I’m happy to stay with you and help you through it. I hope, someday, we can have a healthy, full lesbian relationship, but we’re going to have to take it slow. I want to set up some ground rules so that I don’t go too fast. You told me last night that whatever I do to you is OK, but I don’t think you were thinking through all the things two women can do together.”

Ann went wide-eyed, then got a disgusted look, and went through a few more expressions as she clearly thought out the consequences of what she had said.

“Thank you, Robin, for not taking that too far. I am not sure I know all the things, as you said, but I do want to do some of those things, slowly.”

“OK, then, I will let you initiate any new form of contact between us. We have so far only kissed, some pretty deep kisses, and I will continue to kiss you at appropriate times, but go no further until you ask for it or just go ahead and start doing things yourself.”

“That sounds good, Robin. But I think I may not know even what to ask for.”

“Did you ever date women? Have sex? Watch porn? Masturbate?”

“No women, no sex, no porn. It all reminded me of the rape. Being the one using a penis, potentially, didn’t make it better. I did masturbate, just with my hand. When I got erections as a teen, I learned to masturbate to get rid of them. After college it was a lot less, but I still did it sometimes up until recent times.”

“OK, then, you can just tell me when you’re ready to try something new, when you run out of what you know. I have had several female sexual partners in my life, and while actually being a woman for it is just as new to me as it is to you, I know things to try. I’ll suggest something, maybe help you find some porn so we can watch some other women doing what I suggest, and then you can say yes or no.”

“That sounds good, Robin.”

It wasn’t five minutes later when Ann asked me, “How do women masturbate?”

Of course, given her previous answer, she had never seen it happen in video nor with a live partner. I tried to speak in a neutral tone so I didn’t sound like I was belittling her for not knowing any of this.

“Women are more complicated than men in sexual response. Men have all their sensation in their penis, while women can get sexual excitement from several parts of their body, so they have many ways to masturbate. Dunn talked to us about it a bit.”

“Yeah, but some of it went over my head.”

“Well, she just named the parts. She wasn’t going to actually masturbate in front of us. But I’ll gladly demonstrate for you while I try some of these things for the first time myself.”

“That sounds good,” Ann replied, and she immediately started stripping out of the undersuit, so I did likewise.

As she did so, I mentioned, “One of the sexy things you can do is to strip more slowly and make a show out of it. But it’s hard with these suits. We can try it when we have normal clothes back on Earth.”

Ann didn’t reply, but finished removing the undersuit and her panties and stood there naked in front of me while I also finished stripping.

“One area is the nipples, and to a lesser degree the whole breasts.”

I demonstrated by making a loop around each nipple with one of my index fingers, first one and then the other and then both at the same time. Ann started exploring those with her hands, and was clearly surprised at just how sensitive her nipples were. After a more general exploration of her breasts, she went back to spinning both index fingers around her nipples and looked in bliss from the feelings she got from it. I let her go at it for more than five minutes before continuing.

“And you know about kissing, but Dunn mentioned it can be a component in female sexual excitement. It can get very deep with tongues exploring each others’ mouths, and you didn’t shy away from anything I did that way last night.”

“It was interesting and new to me, though also a bit weird. I could that tell you had some experience and I just let you do it. I did enjoy it.”

“You can’t really masturbate that way, though, at least I don’t think you can. Let me know if you find out differently!”

Ann grinned.

“The other significant areas are all between your legs. You might want to sit up here on the bed to help explore them.”

Ann got herself comfy, sliding back far enough on my bunk so that her calves were at the edge of the mattress. I sat down at the other end of the bed and I turned to face her, legs spread wide, and she turned to mimic that position.

“Dunn specifically talked about these parts, but I understand if you were blocking out that part of her talk.”

“Blocking it out? Yeah, maybe I was. But go ahead. I’m paying attention now.”

Running my finger around the outside of mine, I explained, “This is the vulva, and everything within here is sensitive, to differing degrees.”

I let Ann duplicate what I was going, while experiencing a slight bit of arousal myself. Then I spread the top of it apart with two fingers above and outside.

“This tiny little nub, which gets hidden inside the folds at the top, is the clitoris. This is for most women the most sensitive bit, and it corresponds to the head of the penis. It can get erect when you get aroused, but it’s small and you may still not see it without opening yourself up like I am doing.”

I started rubbing mine, and I actually shuddered with the sensations. It was good, better than anything I had ever felt as a man. Ann touched hers, and seemed afraid to continue touching it, like touching a hot stove. I wanted to keep going, but I also wanted to move along with Ann’s lesson.

“At the other end, this is your vagina. You can get sexual sensations both on the outside and also by penetrating it with an object.”

Ann stammered, “L-l-like a p-p-p-penis?”

“Yes, but you could also use your fingers, or a dildo.”

“Right, I remember that part,” Ann commented.

Dunn had shown us her personal dildo. She had apologized that she only had the one to show, but what we can take into space with us is limited. She invited us to go explore them when we were back on Earth, saying that they varied in length, thickness, texture, and other attributes.

I started poking a finger, then two fingers together into my vagina. The feeling was interesting. It was nowhere near as strong as the feeling at the clitoris, but I felt some arousal. It was a much slower, and, I realized, a building sensation that would grow in intensity as I kept doing it.

Ann watched me with curiosity, and by the time I was experiencing intense pleasure, she started poking a finger into her vagina. I added my thumb on the clit to what I was already doing, and soon felt what was unmistakably an orgasm. My first female orgasm.

Ann stopped before going that far, and said, “Thank you.”

“Oh, but there’s more.”

“More?”

“These folds along the sides are called the labia, or sometimes lips. There are two layers of them, two separate folds on each side of the vulva. They also engorge a bit when you are sexually excited, as we are now, which tends to open up the vulva. When you’re not aroused at all, they fold mostly flat against the body, hiding all the other parts. Both layers are sexually active.”

Ann explored them, and the separation between the inner and outer labia, but she seemed to be done masturbating for this session.

“Finally, I want to point out your urethra. You probably realize this already, since you woke up with a catheter in it, but since there’s no penis, your urine just comes out here, right in the middle of the vulva. It’s hard to even see, but when you are sexually excited it’s easier to spot.”

Ann examined herself and eventually seemed to locate her urethra.

“It’s not sexually active, at least no more than any other part of the vulva, but you may leak a little urine from it when you are sexually excited. That combines with other secretions your body makes at that time to better lubricate the vagina for receiving ... an object,” I told her, avoiding the word I knew she found a bit distasteful.

“You can say it,” Ann replied. “A penis.”

“Yes,” I acknowledged. “A penis, or a dildo.”

When I didn’t say any more, Ann asked, “Are there any more parts?”

“Those are the main ones. Dunn mentioned that some women can get sexual stimulation in other parts of the body, varying by person, so you’ll just need to experiment.”

I intentionally didn’t mention the anus, though I knew that was the most important spot I hadn’t mentioned. Ann didn’t need to hear about that now, and maybe ever.

“OK, thanks for the lesson.”

She got off my bed and put her panties back on, leaving the suit off and thus her breasts hanging out, and she sat in her chair, rolling her fingers around her nipples. I’m not sure if she was afraid to continue exploring her vulva, or just liked the nipple stimulation better, but I started exploring mine as well. All of my girlfriends and my ex-wife had enjoyed that to some degree, and also having them sucked on, though that wasn’t something most women could do to themselves. It might be possible for Ann, due to her size, but I’d let her explore that on her own.

Ann went to bed like that, but I had gotten wet enough that I wanted to wash myself off first. Not a whole shower, just a wipe-down of everything between my legs. With that done I put on my panties and also went to bed without the suit on, playing with my nipples for a bit before I fell asleep.