Angharad

Easy As Falling Off A Bike pt 191

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We walked up to the front door and Tom pushed the bell button, a ding dong chime sounded in the hallway behind the door, I felt quite sick. I kept thinking, the police have to do this sort of thing quite regularly - which probably explains why they're all so bitter and twisted when it comes to dealing with motorists, passing on the grief.

Easy As Falling Off A Bike.
by Angharad.
part 191.



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This story is 73 words long.

Easy As Falling Off A Bike pt 190

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I was in the kitchen making some tea, I badly needed a cup of its life giving waters. I took us out a tray of tea. We sat in the lounge, Tom and Stella jabbering away and me trying to calm down after the afternoon's trauma. I closed my eyes and what seemed like minutes later opened them, it was dark

Easy As Falling Off A Bike
by Angharad,
part:190



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Easy As Falling Off A Bike pt 189

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'N Esmwyth Fel Yn Adfeilio Off Beic.
Gan: Angharad.
Pennod: 189.

Simon had showered and gone before I really came to. I didn't sleep that well and woke worying about Stella, Stevie and my own forthcoming ordeal. I was and wasn't scared of getting the plumbing job done, but I knew it wouldn't be that pleasant and dilation afterwards would literally be a pain.



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Charlotte's Tale part 11.

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“Glad you could make it Charlotte, I mean Christine,” said Mr King looking at his watch. Miss Daws looked at him and then at me in a very funny way, then she nodded.

“It is Charlotte, isn’t it?” she said.

“No, I’m Christine,” I felt myself visibly shrinking under her scrutiny.

Charlotte’s Tale 11.
by Angharad.



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Easy As Falling Off A Bike pt 188

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"It's that dormouse woman," said the same idiot we had seen last time.

"She ain't a woman though is she, she's one of those sexchangers."

"I don't care, I'd still shag her, she's prettier than my girlfriend."

"I'm prettier than your Janice," said wag number two.

Easy As Falling Off A Bike.
by Angharad
part 188.



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Easy As Falling Off A Bike pt 187

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"My tattoo would give it away," I sighed.

"What tattoo?" gasped Simon.

"What, you have seen me starkers and didn't notice my tattoo?" I said pouting.

"No I haven't. What is it?"



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Easy As Falling Off A Bike pt 186

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Easy As Forgetting what It's Called.
by: Erm...
part: 186.

I sat with Simon for about an hour. We didn't say much we were both upset, he cuddled me and I fussed him. We both cried. We both held each other. We both spent several minutes staring into space, or found the leaves of a dandelion suddenly very attention holding.



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Easy As Falling Off A Bike pt 185

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"Who was that?" asked a male voice behind the glass panel.

"A nice lady, I mean a proper Lady, who offered to get me a choccie croissant."

"Slut, I wouldn't touch my foreskin for anyone."

"You idiot, it's forelock, you'd touch your foreskin at any opportunity."

Easy As Falling Over A Bonz.
by Angharad.
part 200-15.



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Easy As Falling Off A Bike pt 184

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'How can these effeminate men call themselves women, let alone Lady Muck? (It's a male dominated system anyway which grants titles for marrying men!). No matter what pills, potions or surgery they have, they'll just be eunuchs with tits! Sista Eileen, Real Active Wimyn.'

Easy As falling Off A Bike
by Angharad
part 184.



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Easy As Falling Off A Bike pt 183

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She didn't answer, so I pitched it anyway. "You are an amazing woman who has looked after me like a big sister and Simon, like a second mother. You have a very busy and important job, to which you are dedicated. In doing it you are helping hundreds of people every year. You are one of the kindest people I know. At this moment your world is under threat of change, especially if I marry Simon. There is also all sorts of things going on affecting your father and his commercial empire. You are under a lot of stress and I think you have to accept that things you do might be seen out of perspective. You did what you thought was for the best. I think it would be a good idea to let it rest there until you have had some time to recover and a chance to talk it over with someone better qualified than I am. So stop crying and give me a hug."



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This story is 168 words long.

Easy As Falling Off A Bike pt 182

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I drove over to the cottage, now less than worried about the press. It was a mess, it had been searched, thankfully, they weren't vandals, so whilst they ripped out the back of wardobes and things, they didn't rip up the clothing. I took several more items down to the car. I didn't think I'd be coming back for a while.

I tidied up Stella and Simon's clothes, but left everything else. The young copper on the door was bored stiff, but he had his job to do, so after making him a cuppa and some sandwiches, I left.



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Charlotte's Tale.

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The most recent, ie part 10 are all new episodes which have not been posted anywhere else.

I know this one is not as popular as some of my other stories, but it's still the one I like best. To the other two who will read it, I hope you enjoy it.

Angharad.

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Charlotte's Tale part 10.

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“Neither do I sweetheart, but we must eat. If you don’t, you’ll lose even more of your bust and the pills won’t do their magic, will they?”

“I suppose not.” I allowed her to cajole me out of bed. My skirt was all creased and the belt had rubbed red marks around my small waist. She got me to strip off and put on my jammies and a dressing gown, and to wash my face and hands. When I’d done so, I padded down the stairs in my slippers, to the kitchen. My mother was standing with her back to me doing something at one of the work tops. I walked up behind her and wrapped my arms around her and said, “I love you and I’m sorry I made you cry.”

She turned around and hugged me, “You didn’t, I’m just sad all the time at the moment.”



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Easy As Falling Off A Bike pt 181

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"Thought you might." I smiled enigmatically again. It was a look I was trying to perfect, the problem is without a mirror, you can't tell how it looks.

"You keep giving me funny smiles," said Simon.

"Do they puzzle you?" I asked.

"Only why you keep doing it."

Easy As Falling Off A Bike
by Angharad
part:181

"Oh shit!" said Simon and bit his lip.



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Easy As Falling Off A Bike pt 180

"And it has made no difference to your department?"

"Why should it, we employ expertise, she is one of the brightest stars in biological fieldwork I have seen for many a year. Her reputation is growing exponentially. She is also one of the prettiest girls in Portsmouth."

Easy As Falling On A Bike.
by: Angharad
part 15 doz.



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Easy As Falling Off A Bike pt 179

"I don't know who is worse, your dad or Dirty Des here?" I said smirking. Des protested his innocence vociferously and Simon sat laughing.

Easy As.......
by: A........
part: 15doz -1

I sat eating sandwiches and glowering at Simon. For two pins I'd go home and sod the lot of them. Sensing movement and expecting Helen Brody the news reader, I was surprised to see Des walk in the door.



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Gires- worth a look

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The link below is worth a look for those who haven't seen it before. Essentially a charitable research organisation with some credibility in the UK.

http://www.gires.org.uk/Web_Page_Assets/frontframeset.htm

Angharad.

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Easy As Falling Off A Bike pt 178

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We were met by two men inside the building and after shaking hands, they took our cases and asked us to follow them. We emerged at the other end of the building and there waiting for us was a small helicopter.

"You don't expect me to get in that do you?" I said feeling very apprehensive.

"It's perfectly safe Miss Watts."

"I expected something with wings on it, not a flying teaspoon."



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This story is 72 words long.

300 and still counting.

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I had my first story posted on the fourth of October 2004 on Sapphires Place, the first episode of Snafu - a confection of New Age, transgenderism, military, medical and the occult. For some reason readers liked it, and I'm still writing it, although a conclusion could be emerging eventually.

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Easy As Falling Off A Bike pt 177

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I'm not as fit as I might be, but I wasn't in too bad a condition, so winding my way between traffic and pedestrians shouldn't prove too challenging. I hadn't counted on a pedestrian with a brain smaller than an amoeba's testicle.

Easy As Falling Off A Bike.
by Angharad.
part 177.



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Charlotte's Tale part 9.

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“Goodness child, you aren’t usually that quick. Got to do this…..wait for that… I forgot to do whatever…. You are never ready this quickly, have you got everything?”

“Yes Mummy, can we hurry?”

“Are you absolutely sure?”

“Not wearing any lip gloss today, then?”



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Easy As Falling Off A Bike pt 176

"You realise how embarrassing this could be for your fiance?"

"What, when he sues you?" I felt so angry.

"I like you Charlie, you've got balls! Oh dear I shouldn't have said that, now you won't like me."

"Go to hell." I suggested very loudly.

"No, I think that's where you're going to go tomorrow if you don't talk to me."

Easy As Falling Off A Bike.
by:Wassername.



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Easy As Falling Off A Bike pt 175

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"I hope your squeal about doctors doesn't mean you are getting cold feet?"

"It's not just my feet which are cold," I said.

"Oh dear, does that mean you are having second thoughts?"

Easy As Falling Off A Bike.
by: Her with the red hair.
Part: one and three quarter hundreds.



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Gaby's Manx Tale

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Just to prove I can write a complete story. This was written for the proto-Gabycon in July 2007, and read to the assembled crowds by the author(who has since lived in hiding). It has previously been posted on Maddy Bell's site.

Gaby’s Manx Tale.
By Angharad.

“You do this to me everytime,” protested Drew.

“You could always do your own packing!” snapped Maddy and went off down the corridor.



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Easy As Falling Off A Bike pt 174

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"What's your problem, haven't you ever seen a naked woman before?" she asked.

"Erm, not really," I blushed like a flash bulb and didn't know where to look, but wished the ground would swallow me up.

Easy As Falling Off A Bike.
by Angharad
part 14.5 dozen.

"Which side are you going to sleep?" asked Stella.



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Easy As Falling Off A Bike pt 173

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We continued drinking our teas and talking until we were interrupted by a shout of anguish. I jumped up and ran out into the lounge.

"What's happening?" I asked.

"Kiki, she's rolled in horse shit and gone belting out through the hole in the fence."

Easy As Falling Off A Bike
by Angharad
part 173.



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Charlotte's Tale part 8.

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I felt as if the world had become a deep, deep pit. I was at the bottom of it, it was dark and the sides were smooth. There were no lights nor ladders. Each day an angel in the form of my mother would come and make me eat and hold me. I would cry and cling to her. I had no energy, no hope, no anything.

Charlotte’s Tale.
Part 8.
by Angharad



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Easy As Falling Off A Bike pt 172

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"She was in dark colours and wobbling all over the road," said Stella winking. "Little did I know that the caterpillar I collided with, was going to transform into such a lovely butterfly."

Pippa looked confused at Stella's statement.

"It was a boy who fell off the bike," offered Stella.

"You have completely lost me," said Pippa.

Easy As Falling Off A Bike.
by Angharad.



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Catering for All Sorts!

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CATERING FOR ALL SORTS - A DRABBLE.

He’d drawn the short straw, undercover waitress, his partner, much bigger, obviously male was the kitchen ‘washer-upper’.

He complained of sore red hands, ‘she’ complained of sore red toes and cursed her heels.

“Any leads yet?” ‘she’ whispered.

“Gotta be here somewhere,” he replied.



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Easy As Falling Off A Bike pt 171

"Cor, something smells nice," said Simon, handing Tom a couple of bottles of wine. He then walked up to me and embracing me said, "Yes something smells very nice." Finally, he kissed me.

Easy As Falling Off A Bike.
by Angharad & Bonzi Kiddle.
part 171.



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Easy As Falling Off A Bike pt 170

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"I was only joking Cathy, I just wanna ring the neck of that little bugger who jumped down your front."

"Why, Spike is adorable?"

"Why, if I did that in front of half the world's press, you wouldn't accuse me of being adorable?"

The image flashed through my brain making my toes curl, "No I doubt I would think you were adorable, but you're not small and furry."



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I cannot believe....

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When I got caught in a thunderstorm on my road bike, that six months later, the blog I was going to write and instead became a story, is still going. I hate to think how many words, pages and megabytes it occupies. It also seems to maintain its relative popularity, for reasons I don't fully understand.

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Easy As Falling Off A Bike pt 169

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"Should we be talking about this in a pub, there could be enemy agents anywhere."

"I had to give two the slip earlier, I think the same two who tried to kill Scott with the snowplough."

"Not the snowplough?" said Simon.

Easy As Forgetting My Welsh.
by: Angharad llaw euraid.
part: cant a'n drigain'n naw.



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Charlotte's Tale part 7.

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“I don’t know. I don’t know.” I screamed, and fell to the floor sobbing. “I’m not a real girl, I don’t know……..I don’t know.” I wanted to die, there and then. I felt so miserable, so awful. The confidence I had been building up after years of living miserably had been shattered. Shattered by the one person I thought I could always trust.



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Easy As Falling Off A Bike pt 168

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I wrapped my scarf around my face and pulled up the hood on my coat, then sunglasses, I wanted to look inconspicuous. I ran into the shop and bought some sandwiches and a drink, plus some chocolate for me and some bread for my dad to have with his soup. I also bought an aerosol of furniture polish. I paid for my items and walking back to my car spotted the occupants of the Audi getting restive.



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Easy As Falling Off A Bike pt 167

"I did some research on the net, looking for material to use with the dormouse prog. I googled you and got very recent stuff, and then dormice and found three things by C. Watts. I opened them and the name was Charles Watts. I checked that out and found a reference to an old school reunion and there was a photo. To be fair it didn't look much like you, then I saw it was a Bristol school.



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Easy As Falling Off A Bike pt 166

I was introduced to the producer of the programme, who was a woman. I always thought they were men who went around in beards and sandals shouting 'cut', or was that directors? Shows what I know. Well Des had a beard and sandals, even in the rain. I was wondering what Simon would look like with a beard. Hmmm maybe I like beards?

As Easy As Falling Off A Bike.
by Angharad.



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Easy As Falling Off A Bike pt 165

I ended the call and managed to get past the tanker. It was a pyrrhic victory, because once past him I couldn't go much faster, the sleet was thickening to snow, just what I needed. I noticed that the concentration of seeing where I was going and keeping the speed and direction safe, was making me grasp the steering wheel much harder than usual.



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Charlotte's Tale part 6.

I was dancing with Simon and one of the other girls walked up behind me and pulled down the zipper on my dress. Of course my boobs were displayed which was embarrassing enough, but then the glue came unstuck and they fell on the floor, exposing me as a fake. Astley was furious, and hit me across the face.



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Easy As Falling Off A Bike pt 164

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Easy Come Easy Go.
by: she's gone!
part:100 plus 4 cubed.



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Easy As Falling Off A Bike pt 163

"From tears? I don't think so. But if I was in your position, I think it might be nice if someone simply held me for a moment, just so my body knew I wasn't entirely alone." He allowed me to hug him and he sobbed in my arms, I wanted to cry too.

Easy As Falling Off A Kite.
by: Angharad
part 163



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Easy As Falling Off A Bike pt 162

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"Don't worry Cathy, I'm too bloody old anyway, I'd probably need Viagra which would give me a heart attack, and serve me right. So, then you'd have to run the project on your own and I couldn't leave you to do that."

"Thank you for that," I smiled back.

"Well I don't want it cocked up, do I? My reputation is riding on this."

Easy As Falling Down A Lift Shaft,
by: Gravity Girl



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This story is 74 words long.

Charlotte's Tale part 5.

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So there I was sailing along, with my return ticket on the Titanic, totally unaware of such things as the existence of icebergs, let alone my impending impact. It seemed, I had all the mental acuity of ‘Homer Simpson’, at times anyway.

Charlotte’s Tale.
Part 5.
by,
Angharad.



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Easy As Falling Off A Bike pt 161

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"Only because I recognise suitable habitats, but the vandals who farm these days, with their bloody flail cutters, make it harder and harder." I was on my soapbox. Normally, Agnew would light the blue touchpaper and enjoy the fireworks, but in front of Pippa, the Dean was not going to let that happen.

Easy As Falling Down A Hole.
by: her, that's the one.
part: the latest one



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Easy As Falling Off A Bike pt 160

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She sat quite happily in my hands for the CCTV, there were offers of a DVD for anyone who needed it for a TV station. Of course the photographers came up and started snapping away. Spike did not like the flashes and began to get agitated. I reached for her box and as I did so, she shot out of my hand along my sleeve and down the neck of my blouse.

Easy As Feeding A Donkey Strawberries.
by: Her wot writes 'em.
part: 2xtriple twenty & double tops = erm!



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Easy As Falling Off A Bike pt 159

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"Why have you bought cat food?" asked Stella, "We don't have a cat."

"It was on special offer." I said defensively.

"We still don't have a cat."

"So, if ever we do, we have food."

"It can eat dormice, there's a hedge full of them out there," countered Stella.

Author's note: Version one was lost during posting, thanks Bill, I'll kill you later!

Easy As Falling Off A Bike.



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Easy 159 lost episode

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Thanks to Bill and his incompetent wankforce I mean workforce, Microshit IE6 or whatever it's called, has just lost the whole of Episode 159.

I will now have to rewrite the whole bloody thing.
Bollocks to Bill!
Angharad.

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The Old Woman's Tale.

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The Old Woman’s Tale.

A Fable.
(Inspired by a close friend).

by Angharad.

She was led through sunlit gardens to a huge mansion, by a being whose countenance could only be described as blissful, not a line on his or her face — the being was of indeterminate sex.

Something that had struck her from the beginning was the light, it was so bright, yet there was no glare, and it warmed rather than burned you like normal sun.



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Easy As Falling Off A Bike pt 158

"Well borrow some of mine."

"Don't be ridiculous, you are several sizes smaller than I, so if I did borrow them, I'd end up singing bloody soprano. Besides what if we had an accident? No thanks, I'll stick with the chaffing."

"I'll kiss it better for you." I said suddenly realising what I had said.

"You'll what?" His face positively lit up.

Easy As Falling In Love.



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Snafu - new episode

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I have written a new episode of Snafu, which has gone to my proofers. It's the first one I've done in 7-8 months, so I hope I haven't lost my touch for an action story, with a difference.

I will offer it to Sapphire first, as she has posted it from the beginning. I trust she will be able to post it fairly quickly.

I hope this cheers up all you who have nagged me to write some more.

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