I had a PTSD dream last night, but one thing was different: I was externally a girl.

Is that an improvement?

I was watching a video about the "Make a Wish" foundation, who give kids with serious health issues a chance to do something they always wanted to, and it occurred to me, this might make an interesting premise for a story here, like a trans kid uses their wish to spend a day as their true selves, or something.

Sadly, right now my writing spoons are missing, so I cant run with the idea, but maybe someone else would like a crack at it.

what do you think?

so because we needed more stress, apparently, I got word that two of my uncles are dealing with serious medical issues, and thanks to family stupidity I don't even know what hospital they were taken to, or anything.

sighs, hugs and prayers appreciated.

so I've been fighting some kind of allergy for days, and I'm getting pretty tired of it.

Can I return my sinuses to the manufacturer?

Got a new story up!

https://bigclosetr.us/topshelf/fiction/87514/extra-body-shampoo

my mom accidently called me "Dorothy" in front of my ex, and she threw a fit saying she didn't know anybody named Dorothy, that my birth name was the name given me by God, and I came really close to stopping the car and telling her to walk to the grocery store.

Sighs, the things I do for love ...

I feel like I'm failing my mom as she has started to struggle with what I think is dementia.

I mean, I'm a mess, barely holding it together for myself, how can I help her?

My mom had a serious and scary dementia moment this morning.

She woke me up at 4 am saying she heard Carol killing Mike.

Then she ran outside in her nightgown looking for an ambulance.

Dam scary stuff, honestly.

I am going for an endoscopy tomorrow, and I'm already struggling with anxiety.

Thanks to my PTSD, I have a gag reflex like nobody's business, and therefore the prospect of having a tube shoved down my throat doesn't exactly fill me with happiness.

hugs appreciated.

Just wanted to let people know, while I have a couple of stories that are close to done, I currently have no spoons for writing.

So it might be a while before they see the light of day.

Sorry.

My mom and I were talking about my bras, and in the process I realized how my breast growth has snuck up on me.

Which got me thinking about my transition in general - that success has snuck up on me, and I hardly noticed it.

Weird, huh?

I've finally got a new story up:

https://bigclosetr.us/topshelf/fiction/87014/karaoke-night

so last night I had the closest thing to a nightmare I've had in a while.

I was at a hospital, taking a class, and as I was making my way to the exit, one of my tormenters from high school jumped on my back as I was going up a flight of stairs.

I somehow managed to not fall down the stairs, bit I lay there, seemingly unable to fight, screaming at the guy to get off me.

I'll be okay, just a bit shook up.

If you are a fan of transformation fiction, or just good science fiction, you've probably have at least heard of Jack L. Chalker. Well, I found a book by him that could have easily been written here.

It's called "The Identity Matrix", and its the story of Victor Gosner, a 35 year-old expert in political science who finds himself body swapped with a 13 year old native American girl, and then into the body of a blonde bombshell co-ed.

I found the characters charming, the situation engaging, and the book really hard to put down, so it gets a recommendation from me.

Okay so last night's dream was a bit different. I was in a school, and apparently part of the the cleaning crew. I confirmed with a teacher where I was to clean, and when she said I should know already, I told her I'd been away for a while and wanted to have the expectations I was to meet clear.

I went into the room, and started moping, and then someone joined me, and a after a moment of confusion, I figured out she was a trainee I was supposed to supervise. The dream ended with the room clean and me with a sense of accomplishment.

Make of that what you will.