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I've lost two friends today.

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One, a casual friend named Anselmo Nunez...an older Puerto Rican man who I took back and forth from dialysis for over four years. He was teaching me spanish, a little bit at a time..as quickly as my poor overloaded mind could take it in. He had no legs left, lost to diabetes, yet he walked on his two artificial ones until last year when his illness finally confined him to a power wheelchair.

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UK "equivalent" of Allie Burns' department

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I came across this BBC article about the UK's "Child Exploitation and Online Protection centre" which is somewhat similar to Allie Burns' department.

Perhaps, one day, we will see Allie visiting the UK?

URL http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/7359589.stm

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Good News Aunt Jane Fans,There Is A Brand New Seasons House Story

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Posted at Fictionmania by Tigger. It will whet your appetite for Aunt Jane and Seasons House and being from Tigger, I know that it is a good as his other Seasons House Stories. I will not give away the plot, you have to read it or your self.

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Weekends are too short!

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Here we are again, the end of another weekend with work lurking just over the horizon. Once more I feel that I haven't done very much at all, didn't do a bike ride or write another masterpiece, only fiddled about and achieved very little.

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George McDonald Fraser

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It almost slipped past me, but I saw a notice of the death of George McDonald Fraser and I thought surely there must be other BCTS readers who liked his novels. In fact it was Alys's highwaylady that jogged my memory (pure accidental mental association, you understand).

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I'm back, hopefully for good, and with a new purpose and resolve.

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I know I've been more than a bit 'melodramatic' over the past few weeks. All I can say in my defense, is that I have been wrestling with old, bad memories and present day fears. It's taken a couple of days of "alone time" recently, to wrestle with my demons, major and minor, and at the end of that, I found myself with a new purpose, or a redux of my original purpose.

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HIV is frightening Stuff.

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The following link is to an e-medical journal, which I hope works (the link I mean). It's pretty serious stuff but as a health professional, I make no apologies for it.

http://www.medscape.com/viewarticle/571708_print

Angharad.

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Lesbian sex

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While wandering the web tonight, I stopped by the Skepchick website. This website is crewed by some wonderfully independent thinkers with a knack for finding and writing about things I find interesting and/or amusing. While browsing through the various bits, I came across a link to another blog, by Greta Christina.

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I Think That Everybody Will Enjoy This News

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I was in Church tonight when the teacher asked what would happen if the sign said " Homosexuals And Lesbians Welcome Here." That sparked a lively debate.

I wonder just how many churches actually welcome all into the church? I would hope that there were more Churches that would open their doors to all.

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Changed by Alien's Chapter 3 (Make them scream like babies)

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In an effort to get out of this whiny assed, needs a whippin' blue funk, I am working on the next installment. Expect action, like you ain't seen no shit like this befo'. It's going to be one of those "leave the ladies faint" episodes with much funk and gore.

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All Dolled Up

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I have become aware that a number of the parents that I know have followed the same protocal as in the story. Happily, all the boys have tired of the practice and moved on to other things. I wonder what sort of teens, men, husbands these males will be?

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Orphan 14 - I've dun it again!

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There I was last night huddling over a dim candle, blanket around my shoulders , shivering into my cocoa, trying to make sense of the latest chapter of Orphan.

In the end, I noticed the clock and decided that I would just have to send it out as it was.

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Girl - the original meaning.

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According to Sol Steinmetz, lexicographer and dictionary editor,(author of Semantic Antics), speaking on the BBC Radio 4 programme, Word of Mouth, 15.4.08, the original meaning of the word girl, was a young child of either sex.

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Show Me the Money

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Message from the author.

Arecee has told us that after part 30 he is taking a little break to look at his other story and come back to Show Me. Writing a couple of stories at the same time is tiring so for the time being he is taking a bit of time off to recouperate.

Hopefully it will continue asap

Samantha

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Gabyzone/Cyberbrats nameservice issues

For anyone wondering what happened to cyberbrats chatnet, which is home to the gabyzone channel, please note there are only name service issues. Chatnet itself is still online and running. For anyone wanting to get in, please use 88.198.48.47. This is one of the european servers of CyberBrats Chatnet.

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I am leaving for awhile.

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There are too many things on my mind and I cannot concentrate or even communicate with clarity. i know where my mind is headed and its a place I know very well. In that place I can harm people without caring what harm I do, and none of you deserve that, so I am leaving before I do that.

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A Giant of the Music/Dance Industry is Gone ...

Bob Kames, a Milwaukee businessman and minor recording artist died recently. He was in his early 80's and in declining health. You are all going, "Bob WHO?"

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Re: FTM, Trans, Porn, Boundaries

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This week's column from Tristan Taormino takes a look at what she characterizes as a new wave of "tranny porn". She reviews a number of movies featuring transmen. The reviews are explicit. The films don't sound like ones I'll be looking for, but I merely pass this column on for educational purposes in case anyone is interested.

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Some exciting news! A possible BOOK SIGNING at Waldenbooks for me!

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While out with friends today, Saturday, we stopped at our local mall Waldenbooks store. I casually remarked, while checking out with our books, that if I ever saw MY book in the place, I'd probably faint. The clerk, as we were leaving, asked me, "You have a book out?"

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My stories and sexual content

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I have in the past been accused of being a prude when it comes to writing my stories but I can honestly say that I am not a prude but I write my stories for a different reason. I don't write for the tittilation factor but rather to see the building of characters and plot. Too many stories, IMHO, are based solely on sexual content and no plot. That type of story I don't read.

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I'm still here, if anyone wondered

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I've spent the last fortnight alternating between the throes of nicotine deprivation and guilt from succumbing to it - I am too weak.

I've written nothing, though I've had a few new ideas, and earlier this week I - accidentally - half sold the idea of 'Midnight Angels' to one of the commissioning editors in work - like I need the pressure!

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And Now We Know

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The jury is in. Our collective apprehension about the contents of the pop up ads has been put to rest by experience. Whatever filtering process Erin is putting them through works just fine. Hope they put lots of pennies in the hatbox.

Hugs to all, Daphne

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In Need of a Title

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I have almost completed the second draft of the first part of a three part story, and I already have the draft of part two finished and three outlined. The only major question now is what to call it? Its your typical Reluctant Cheerleader type story, and suggestions are welcome, with more information provided if requested. Also, for the one person who may still be waiting, Echoes 5 is still on hold until I have a computer again. On a related note, anyone wanna give away a laptop with wireless?

Melanie

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Eulogizing a Mom

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Someone tried to bring this column to my attention several days ago, but I only just found it myself. It's Dan Savage's eloquent eulogy of his mother.

Many stories here have dealt with the family dynamics of "coming out" as transgendered. A frequent theme that appears is "oh, we thought you were gay," or hateful homophobic epithets while the beating occurs.

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Whateley Timeline

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I have been reading some of the whateley stories recently, and lets just say the timeline has been making a pile of mush inside of my head. I have read most of the stories on this page now http://www.crystalhall.org/stories.html and with the timeline posted on this site (http://bigclosetr.us/topshelf/story/252/announcement) it helped alot.

##### Spoiler below i guess ######

... And the Nominees are...

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Apparently not going to happen.

So. The naysayers that wanted the project killed are going to be happy, at least. I received a total of 7 nominees. I wanted at least 1 nominee per category -- I didn't think it was too much to ask.

Ah well. Was probably a dumb idea anyway.

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In answer to some questions that were implied.

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I have gained permission to use names by those who are mentioned in my posting.

I want to thank those who posted comments to my 'blog'. As stated, the events are true because my husband, Grover, and I have and are still coming to terms with what is going on between us.

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Is this all there is?

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I am sitting here feeling very confused and disillusioned. I am no longer sure that any of this transgender stuff is anything but a delusional fantasy. The thing that makes it really bitter is that I believed it all. I'd had these drives for 57 of my 61 years and my siblings say it was evident even before that. I'd been led to believe that the solution for the problem was the surgery that I had.

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A Long Overdue Eulogy

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Author's forward:

{It has taken me ten long years to get to the point where I could talk about this without crying. I hope you will all forgive me for taking time and space here, to remember the best man I ever knew.}

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British Cycling

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I finally got around to joining British Cycling, which for those not in the know, is an organisation dedicated to sport and leisure cycling. I'm already a member of the Cyclist's Touring Club, which is the main lobbying group for cyclists.

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Thursday's Afternoon Play

on BBC Radio 4, 'Out of season' by Anne-Marie O'Connor, deals with four people visiting a cafe in Blackpool and the thoughts they have about what is going on in their lives. One of whom is a M2F transsexual, meeting her father for the first time.

The whole thing was quite well done.

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Oprah

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I am wondering what you all thought of this particular episode of Oprah, and how it treated both the subject of Gender Dysphoria and the Pregnancy of a Thomas? I ask these questions both for myself and others who may come to this site. I for one am a nontransgender person. But I enjoy my pitiful writing, both in content and technique. And the comment made by Thomas, about how the community has over all treated him. Please Respond. I ask that you do put it in the main area below, But I understand if you can only do it privately. Thanks.

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200 at 2:05

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At 2:05 pm PDT this afternoon, we hit 200 users at the same time. Because of a minor auto-update scheduled at that time, this caused a database "brownout". I took Apache and Mysql down and restarted them so some of you likely experienced a few mysterious messages while trying to load pages.

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Pregnant TG man to appear on Oprah

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From Yahoo News:

A transgender man who kept his female reproductive organs despite his transformation is now five months pregnant and will appear on Oprah Winfrey's television show, the talk show said on Tuesday.

"I'm a person and I have the right to have my own biological child," Thomas Beatie, of Bend, Oregon, said in excerpts from the show, which airs on Thursday.

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Blogging vs. Trolling - Perhaps a Contest?

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Someone recently created an account here for the sole purpose of posting a blog to complain that a BC author with a similar name got a higher Google rating than he. After thinking about it and deciding it wasn't really an April Fowl Joke, I unpubbed the blog and blocked the account. Essentially a whiny troll who didn't even know how to provide a usable link to his site, he got me to thinking:

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Characters Worthy Of Being In S.P.A.

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There are currently three authors doing stories in the S.P.A. universe of Karen Page. I was wondering how many characters from other series would qualify for either Immigration Manor or Hayfield Hall. There are a few teen and preteen characters here that I think would qualify if they ever took the tests. I wonder what the authors and readers think.

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The Long wait is over.... I'm Back

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I'm Sorry about the long wait and apparent death of my story. For the longest time I could not see where I wanted to go with it and I finally found my muse again.
I sould have chapter 3 up by next week (hopefully)

Remember I am still sort of new at writing for others to read so I am looking for any way to improve.

A warm Thank you to everyone who has commented or voted for my stories.

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sorted for tea and bids

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Since my last blog entry I've been immersed in the world of English porcelain patterns (or at least the eBay window on it), and have started placing bids. There's a bit of a divide between what I'd love, and what I can afford; I've been very taken with Edwardian Crown Derby Imari, but at around  £25 a setting it'll have to wait, so I've plumped for a slightly later, more common deco-ish imari that's easier to find, and match.

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New stories by TG Sine

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Hello all:

I am continuing my Tarja story, but I had a little writer's block. However, while I was dealing with my writer's block, I started a new story, 'April & Rain', and last month I started - for the short story contest - a 'short story', but since the contest is over, I decided to make in into another story.
I hope those 2 will be up this week.

TG Sine

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Arrgh

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For clarity's sake, no, I haven't gotten "lazy" lately. I've been having issues with life. The last time I shared something personal here, I said I'd not do it again because of the reaction I received -- which very nearly made me leave and not come back.

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My first kinky show.

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I met the Kajira side of Gwen.

I got myself invited to work as an assistant to a person who does Shibari rope bondage. :) Yyyyaaaayyyyy ! ! ! Did I have fun? Yeeeesssssss! All I really did was recoil the ropes as they were untied from the person who had been tied up. It was my first experience with anything like this and it was soooo much fun.

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Computer Virus

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I am unsure of the best way to spread the word, so I chose to blog it.

I was just the recipient of two viruses that were very costly to get rid of. SpyBot@MXt and NetWorm-Ivirus@fp took over about 75% of the function of my machine. That, in spite of my having Norton 360 and updated regularly.

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Spiral Scouts - Scouting for children of all kinds

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53 weeks

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I have noticed that I became a member here a year and a week ago, which for some is probably 53 weeks too long. I have frequented this site for a few years but previously as a reader, particularly attracted by Wanda's 'Kelly Girl', which I still consider one of the best stories here. In those days I was just an occasional reader.

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Chrissie

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Hi, I'm just letting everyone know that Chrissie will be ready for purchase the middle of May, and will be available at Barnes and Noble.com, Amazon.com, and Borders.com. You may also order these at the stores, rather than online, if there is one near you.

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Does This Ever Happen To You?

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Last night, after I got through reading the latest "Bike" chapter, I went to bed early. But for some reason, sleep was hard to come by.

I was sleepy, but as soon as I lay down, I began to have chills and I felt like I had just run a marathon. I finally went to sleep after a bit, but I still feel weak.

Oh well, this happens every now and then, but I wish that it did not.

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The Latest news about KimEM......

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Well, It's been a while since I posted an update... I've done some updates on a person 2 person basis, or to small groups in the GabyZone chat-room, but it's time to get everyon caught up...

Kim left Deborah Heart and lung center, 2 or 3 weeks ago now.... I'm not sure exact dates because my schedule is all turned around...

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Asperger's Syndrome

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The other night I was watching the award winning "House" drama, and there was a bit about a kid with Asperger's syndrome. Well, it piqued my curiosity because most of the symptoms mentioned sounded like an inventory of my life.

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My questionable mental state.

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I am, it seems, experiencing some mental aberrations. I've ranted and raved at friends. I've been rude and even cruel to some who didn't deserve it. I've been experiencing wild swings in my emotions, laughing one minute, crying uncontrollably the next.

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A sincere apology to Sephrena.

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I was very rude and cruel to you last night on skype. I didn't mean to be, but I've been very emotional the past few days. Still, I shouldn't have taken it out on you, and I apologize. I haven't seen you online since then, and I hope it's not because of me. You've always been there for me, and you're a friend, and I love you.

Please forgive me?

Cathy

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Duty Honor Country Family Parts 6 and 7 notes

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A recent commenter wrote-

"This is quite well done. do you live in Japan? You seem so familliar with the culture and the criminals anyway."

I've never lived in Japan but have visited the country. The occasional bits of Japanese in the story are being provided to me by a friend. From 1987 to 1989 while serving in the Navy, I was stationed in the Philippines at Subic Bay.

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