Blogs, Topics, Weblinks, Forms, Polls etc.

a question of Identity

Well, my little link about TG kids seems to have produced some interesting responses, the one everyone is talking about is the person who seems to feel disappointed that we are not all a bunch of sissy masochists. In honor of him, I wanted to produce a list of questions that would generate some anecdotal evidence that we who are transgendered actually do exist, and my own answers.

1: When did you first notice a gender variance in yourself? My memories are hazy, but my best recollection puts it just before my sexual assault, so that would be about 7 years old.

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Aunt Roe's last gift

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After a lot of conniving double-handed back stabbing that included a lot of misdirection and lying, I am saddened to announce that my mother did not steal my inheritance. She tried her best to do so, with the truth of what she was doing coming to me in the end. She did things like tell the insurance company she was my aunt's only surviving near relative (I guess nephews don't count as near relatives, but besides, my Aunt also has a surviving older brother).

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One reason why stories die (and what to do about it)

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I've been writing for a long time, and I'm not saying that I'm great at it... I think I'm pretty good for a sandlot player, but definitely not in the big leagues.

However, there are a few things I've learned, and one biggie is the difference between situations and stories.

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Janet L. Stickney

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Janet L. Stickney
Blog
By Stanman63

She started posting her stories here, but has stopped. At the same time, I was accused of plagiarizing her stories. Can anybody contact her and let her know that if I have offended her that I apologize?


Stanman
May Your Light Forever Shine
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Masks

A thought I had several decades ago, and has been reiterated more than once here is the idea of wearing a mask. Nothing physical, just the emotional face you show people under different circumstances. We always have one on. Sometimes they are thinner than other times, but we always wear it. I think couples occasionally drop them, but even then it is rare.

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The Stars and Stripes Anthem

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Somebody sent me a link to You Tube it was group of kids singing the Stars and Stripes and very well I might add.

Later on in the evening I thought that the situation in which the Anthem was written was funny.

Now don`t get me wrong I`ve nothing against the USA and have served alongside US troops when I was in the Army.

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Old style writing tips from William Safire (timeless)

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Found this blast of writing rules from the past at Lists of Note

Late-1979, New York Times columnist William Safire compiled a list of "Fumblerules of Grammar" – rules of writing, all of which are humorously self-contradictory – and published them in his popular column, "On Language." Those 36 fumblerules can be seen below, along with another 18 that later featured in Safire's book, Fumblerules: A Lighthearted Guide to Grammar and Good Usage.

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Who I am, and why my avatar name.

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This is my first entry. There is a lot about using BCTS I don't know, I will try to learn over time.

Allow me to introduce myself. Over time I will talk about me, then branch out. I will try my hand at fictional writing eventually, I already do a lot of writing of a different nature, text books and electronics. I am in my mid 50's.

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Dilation school

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Ok, girls take out a pen and paper and be sure to jot down notes. Test to follow.

So, I spent a delightful morning at the Gyno docs while she taught he how I might get myself out of my pruned up Vagina problem. You see, I have been a bad little girl and stopped dilating about 2 years ago, and now I don't think a rabbit could do me.

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I give up!

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I'm sorry y'all, but there won't be a Wild Magic chapter today-I've been working on it, but I have less than a page done. I'm very sorry, and I hope to have the next chapter in the morning.

I'm advertising for a trade-I've tried tying her down, shackeling her ankle, but she seems to like it. Somebody swap Muses with me!

Wren

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02) Atlantia - New Story: Want Illustrator

OK, so while OYH's hiatus will continue for a bit longer, a new character has grabbed my attention and wants to be heard.

This character will be a cop from a town called Atlantia, which doesn't exist. Atlantia is a hidden town of magic and superpowers that once you've entered, you cannot leave. It was founded by refugees from Atlantis, whose history according to my story might be a little different to what you're used to.

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Why is "Transgender" wrong?

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Recently, while reading the comments on someone's blog post, I notices that somebody was talking about hating the term 'transgender'. I realize that it's used as an umbrella term, but that's how I think of myself. Apparently, it's politically incorrect or insensitive to use that term, though.

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I was the house servant

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Our life experiences give us all sorts of story ideas. It is just amazing.

Tonight I watched, "The Help", and I have no doubts in my mind that if the story is not literally true, it is in substance. Oddly, it took me back to my time with my family, and as I watched it, I realized that I had about the same status in my home as one of "them coloreds", and when they could no longer use me, I was fired. It was a dark, bleak realization but now I feel empowered.

Through the years, I have talked to other T folk who related the same sort of thing to me, it is not an uncommon experience

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Update on "The Dream"

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Hey everyone,

Sorry it has been quite some time since I have posted anything.

My muse seems to have taken a vacation (without my approval), I have some written but as soon as I can find the right thought process I will continue.

Thank you all for being patient and I will continue Terri's events

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out of bad, good

Well, something good came out of the comment my mom made at breakfast. I got a very supportive comment from my brother when I posted about it on face book, and here it is:

"To become something new the old must pass away. This is not really a bad thing. Those of us who love you, loved you as who you were, as who you are, and as who you will be. From your point of view "The Todd is dead, long live the Dot"."

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If You Could Be Any Character

If you could be any character in a movie, poem, play, song, story, ect who would you be?

My choice would be at least one of the female leads in "You Got Mail," "Sleepless in Seattle," "Robin Hood, Prince of Thieves," Sandra Bullock's characters in "Practical Magic" and "Two Weeks Notice," Minerva Chesterton, Duchess of Wolverstone in Mastered by Love and the Black Cobra Quartet series by Stephanie Laurence.

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It's Bitch & Whine Time Again!

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I HATE it that, when I click on the "Great Story" button, to make room for "Thank you for the kudo" (or whatever it says), everything below drops a line. So, when I try to click on "++Bookmark", I end up clicking on something else.

It seems to me that there is plenty of blank space to the right of the GS button so why does the 'kudo' acknowledgement have to go UNDER it in space that has to be created forcing the blue links out of position?

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Formulating a story idea...

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Hi All!

I am mulling a short story idea over and over in my mind. It would involve a young M2F trans girl and her estranged father (mother is no longer in the picture - not sure why yet). In the story, she (the trans girl) desperately wants him to attend her 'life wedding' but he is 'hung up' on her being a trans person...he can't get past the thought of her once being his son. Continued...

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a good cry makes me feel better?

Well, it feels like I passed a milestone, and it was a painful as passing a kidney stone. I went to bed, called my dog to join me, and holding on to her soft fur, I wept freely, and for some reason, kept repeating how sorry I was. Now, I think I'm a little better for it. As odd as it sounds, it feels like I accomplished something important by being able to do this.

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Life Imitates Art

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Having noticed (and envied) the success of Daughter to Demons, the US SyFy network (available through many cable providers) has brought out a SF/F series named Lost Girl whose protagonist is a Succubus. Copycats...

http://www.syfy.com/lostgirl

Levanah

לבנה

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Principal Boy / Bike

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My original idea was to write a longer piece but I decided that you'd all be bored with it after a few pages, so I stopped where I did.

Female intuition leads me to suspect one or two of you might like a bit more of this, so when I have a few minutes I'll possibly do a second installment but that will be it.

I see we're coming up to sixteen hundred episodes of Bike, do I presume the regulars want me to continue with that as well?

So do let me know on both of these if you would.

Angharad & the >^^< team.

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Cats of the World, Unite

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There have been some horrible crimes in Arkansas over the last few days. Domestic violence seems to be exploding and culminated in several murders and suicides, and suicide by police. This is a crime of another nature and the person who committed it is just as sick as any other murderer.

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The game is on

So yeah, my company has recently started a joined venture with HBO and as a special we could get our picture taken on the throne.

I'm rather pleased with the result, and thought i'd share it here :)

Amber on the Throne

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For those of you who are following My so-called (Un)Life...

I'm going to be taking a small break from writing her story after this last chapter to start working on another project for the Dark Realms Universe. Chapter 5 in (Un)Life is almost finished and I should have that posted in the next day or two. I say all of this because it will be a while before I actually post anything for this new project of mine, as I'd like to try and finish the story, or get close to finishing at least, before I actually post any of it. (Un)Life has alot of story left in it, and I will be getting back to it once the new one is out of the way.

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Fluffy but painful

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I started writing a pinkilicious birthday and people are probably wondering where the next chapter is. It is coming, but this is a much slower write than my previous stuff. One of the main reasons is though it is a fluffy piece, with a little more introspection than it's prequel, it is extremely painful for me to write and I really wasn't expecting that.

Let me explain:

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Come so far, but so far to go

I've kinda reached a place where I'm being forced to choose between moving forward and risking what I've already accomplished. See, the next steps are kinda tricky - I have to somehow navigate the ex, change my name, and then I'll be as close as I think I can come as surgery is not likely. But the risks are high too, I flop it with the ex and I worry I'll be tempted to just go back into the closet until I die. I think that's why I've been delaying putting my name change in high gear, much less confront the ex. But standing still isnt much of a option, at least not for long. Ah, well.

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Comment related writers block :(

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Due to a couple of comments left for my 'To Make A Wish' story I've been unable to add any more to it as they have given me writers block :(
Part of me thinks the person leaving the comments just didn't understand or follow the story very well, but then another part started to wonder if maybe they were right and I'm just not very good at telling it, so since then I've been unable to add any more to the story, and can't see me ever being able to in the near future either, as every time I try to add to it, I just start second guessing myself and have to give up.

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Small steps - the next one: Waiting for some numbers

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Today I visited the "officially sanctioned vampires".

I had an appointment with the endocrinologist to find out if there are any medical influences to my transsexuality.
They took only about eight or nine vials of blood to analyze my current hormone status and look for potential chromosomal irregularities.

Now I have to wait a few days for some numbers ;)

Realistically I expect unremarkable values inside the normal range, but surprises are possible.

After that I will start to think about the next steps. (or rather plan the next steps I'm thinking about for years...)

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20,000,000 visitors and counting

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Sometime between 11a.m. and noon, PST, this morning, we hit 20,000,000 visitors on the site counter. Since that only goes back to June 15, 2005, we really had probably a million visitors in the six years before that. At the current rate of visitors coming to the site, we'll hit another 20 million in about three years. :)

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The Family Girl #026: Moe's Back!

    
The Family Girl Blogs
(aka "The New Working Girl Blogs")

 

Blog #26: Moe's Back!

To see all of Bobbie's Family Girl Blogs, click on this link:
http://bigclosetr.us/topshelf/book/28818/family-girl-blogs

MoeMoe is Back!

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A chalenge walking in

There are a lot of documented cases of walk-ins, like the 16 year old girl in Watseka, Illinois who went out to the porch and came back in a different person. The body is a shell the brain is the processing system that runs it, the soul /spirt is the operating system, when you go in to another body all of its memories go with the spirit that left and you bring your own set of memories with you. I am not going to go in to a long explanation, lets just say if you jump from being a boy to girl and have no way to access girl memories you have to re-learn it, unless you can access past lives ( yes reincarnation dose exist and no you will not reincarnate as a animal or plant) Thats the nut shell version. If you have any questions feel free to ask, but don't just take my word, the truth is all around if you just put it out there and listen to your inner most heart (If you find someone with all the answers Run). There are a lot of tomes out there and if you seek it will come. .

KUNG HEI FAT CHOI

This side (Eastern Hemisphere) of the International Dateline it is Monday 23 January, which is the first day of the Chinese New Year.

WELCOME TO THE YEAR OF THE DRAGON
May you all have a truly wonderful year

Joanne

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Golf Season Has started

I know there are some sports fans and golf fans out there. If you are relatively new to this site, you might want to read Bobbie and the Glass Ceiling. The story belongs to the Cynthia Chronicles series and has many of the characters that were recently featured in Charli and the Girl Cave. The story takes place in a famous golf venue. In spite of what many may think, golf is not a good walk ruined.

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writers block

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I cant decide how to start this
points are
waking up on a wooden boat/at sea
the sound of wave
the motion of the boat
the smell of the sea
on a cot btw

my tries

I awoke to the sound of waves and the sensation of rising and falling
Still half-asleep I was startled awake

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oh dear god....

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I can't believe that I can't get my butt in gear to write anymore...

I hate to do this, but I think I will post what I have, then post scenes as I get them in my head. I think it would likely make people happier than me not posting anything for such long periods of time.

Stand by for short posts Chapter 28.1, ETA... a few minutes from now.

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"The Procedure" & "The Graduate"

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Towards the end of the movie “The Graduate”, Benjamin (played by Dustin Hoffman) frantically rushes to save Elaine (Katherine Ross) from marrying. He drives to San Francisco and across the San Francisco-Oakland Bay Bridge to Berkeley, where the wedding ceremony is taking place. Simon & Garfunkel merrily sing in the background as there’s a spectacular shot of Benjamin’s car driving in the sunlight over the bridge crossing the sparkling waters of San Francisco Bay–

Except you can’t do that ...

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Twenty Million!

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I noticed the hit count for visitors is over 19,793,000. Wasn't just yesterday that we (I think I'm allowed to say 'we') hit 10,000,000. What a great job done by Erin and the others who know how to make this refuge so nice.

Portia

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Making a comeback

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After a year of deep intense therapy, psychotrophic drug adjustments I am finally beginning to settle in. I had two stories I wrote under an assumed alias now under my name and a friend who is searching their archives for a story we penned together.
I am not out of the woods yet, I've learned that people who have any sort of vascular surgery tend to get depressed often.
I am awaiting vascular surgery on my left leg some time this year and if it was like the surgery on my right leg I am going to have three to four months where my memory is going to be vaguee.

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Feeling a bit unsteady.

I'm quite sorry, but I am feeling a bit off, but please no cause for alarm. I promise not to do anything I shouldn't OK? I just need to emote a little here. If I do not feel better by Monday, I will seek to get back under care again.

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What's New / What's Broken

This is a refrence blog of things that people have mentioned to us as being broken or different.

Item's that have been "fixed" or we have decided to not fix, are marked with a strike through.

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Avatars (comment / message pictures)

OK, the feature only appeared yesterday, but since I've already had one person asking me how to do it, I thought it might turn out to be a FAQ in time.

So, you may have noticed since the upgrade that some people have small images sitting in the top right corner of their comments:

Example

If you think that's a cool feature, and would like to know how to do it yourself, read on...

Not pining for the fjords ...

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I don't have an ex-muse either.

The black dog -- a *huge* Black Dog -- that took up residence a few years ago is shrinking a bit. The critter's not gone, but things are less overwhelming.

My writing time is limited, for now. I'm working ~12 hour days at a job involving flight safety ( a.k.a. BAD THINGS can happen if it isn't right.)

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Caching and Why it's Good for you! :)

First off -- What is Caching?

From Wikipedia:
In computer engineering, a cache ( /ˈká¦Êƒ/ kash[1]) is a component that transparently stores data so that future requests for that data can be served faster. The data that is stored within a cache might be values that have been computed earlier or duplicates of original values that are stored elsewhere. If requested data is contained in the cache (cache hit), this request can be served by simply reading the cache, which is comparatively faster. Otherwise (cache miss), the data has to be recomputed or fetched from its original storage location, which is comparatively slower. Hence, the greater the number of requests that can be served from the cache, the faster the overall system performance becomes.

A Standing Ovation for Erin, Piper, et all,

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for the amazing job they have done in updating our home away from home on the internet. Words alone cannot express MY appreciation for all they do and all they have done to make this the PREMIERE TG Fiction site on the net, but words are all I have so,

BRAVA, BRAVA, BRAVA!

For they are jolly good ladies, for they are jolly good ladies. For they are jolly good laaaadieeees... which NOBODY can deny!

From my heart, Thank you, one and all.

Catherine Linda Michel

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The Family Girl #025: Anticipation

The Family Girl Blogs
(aka "The New Working Girl Blogs")

Blog #25: Anticipation

To see all of Bobbie's Family Girl Blogs, click on this link:
http://bigclosetr.us/topshelf/book/28818/family-girl-blogs

My partner's done with her interviews in Manila, and she passed three of her four interviews.   So I guess we are pushing through with it.   She visited her family, and is having a wonderful time.   Turns put that she didn't need to check in at the hotel she had reserved a room in.   But the biggest, most important thing, is that she's coming home tomorrow.   Yayyyy!   I'm excited!

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Happy anniversary to The Rev. Anam Chara

I just wanted to take a second, and wish a Happy anniversary to my friend and fellow believer, The Rev. Anam Chara, who passed the two year mark here while the site was down. I'm so glad you came to this place, and I wish you many, many more years of bringing us your particular take on things.

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BigCloset Search and Taxonomy Interception

First off, I'm going to start this posting with a description of how Drupal works traditionally and how BigCloset works now. Some of this information is a copy and paste of a Comment I made on a blog.

Traditionally everything in Drupal is stored in a MySQL or similar database.

Update - Original Author Found or Author and Story Reunited

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Last month I had posted a request about a story I was looking for. I ended up finding it myself and I posted it here. The story is called Beauty and the Vial http://bigclosetr.us/topshelf/fiction/33443/beauty-and-vial

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the "Procedure" ?

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Hello every body.
In several stories, there is a mention of a procedure to pass as a woman before having the go to have THE surgery.
It goes something like this:
-1- Testicles back up into abdomen.
-2- Empty scrotal sacks pulled around penis to simulate labial lips.
-3- Penis straight back.
-4- Surgical glue holding the penis against the perineum.
Is there any reality to it?
Is there any name for it?
Any way to search it on the web without so many other stuff that are no related in any way ?

Thanks for your time.
Have a good night T.M.F.

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Book review - Luna

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This isn't a new novel, it was published in 2004, but I enjoyed it so much I felt a need to share my enjoyment.

It's written by Julie Anne Peters and is written for teenagers, she specialises in that age group and she is a gay woman rather than tg.

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Blog 1: First TG experience

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I’ve never really done this blogging thing before but I guess I’ll give it a go. First of all my penname is Ramona Flowers (taken from Scott Pilgrim, yes). I have been writing TG for about two years now so I’ve decided to branch out and post on other TG sites. I’m nineteen. I’m from Ireland, I live in Dublin and I have been there for about two years.

Um . . . yeah

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Holiday Reading

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I just had a weeks holiday in sunny Spain ,average temp 20o,luverly jubbly as England is 10o.I took my kindle ready loaded with two Tanya Allans and one Susanne Brown,and when we were not sightseeing or marketing I had a thoroughly good read and lost myself in London and Penmarris.Many thanks to the two authors for some good reading.

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a couple of nice moments

Well, I had a couple of nice moments over the last couple of days. First, My mom and I were talking about an aunt who wants to change her name, and mom groused about it feeling like she was talking about a stranger. I said that it was about respecting her choice, just like calling me "Dorothy" is. She said, "But Dorothy suits you."

I thought that was kinda cool.

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Tanya Allan in Paperback

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Hi

what wither everything that is happening in my life at this moment, it is with great pleasure that I can announce that i am now in print..the real, paper stuff!

I have eight (so far) titles available. Find them here: feedaread.com

More soon, until I have all twenty five titles available. Then I can start the next round of new stuff!

Tanya

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May be losing more sites

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A few weeks back I went to look over a site named Vicki Irene's. I'm sure many of you have checked it over. She had posted that she never asked for help paying for the site, but stated she was open to any donations someone wanted to give. The site name expired and she apparently never re-newed it. It has been gone for many weeks now. We lost the old geocities sites....many are on reo-cities I guess. Haven't checked yet. Today I went to open Sapphire's site, and the name has expired there also.

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Update

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Because of my stroke and heart issues I had visit my Endocronologist again 5 days ago, I've been told to stop my HRT for 6 weeks during this time I also have to quit smoking (no lectures please, I'm well versed in the evils of smoking and it means nothing to an addict)

I've procured some help to quit so hopefully next week I will be smoke free. After 6 weeks and so long as I've quit my Endo will put me on a new gel based HRT that will supposedly cut my risk of clotting due to HRT, still no date for the heart procedure though.

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LGBT Center In NYC

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I was reading my AARP newspaper (organization for retired people)and found a article about the opening of a LGBT center in NYC that will help with the following, Caregiving-Financial Planning-Employment Assistance-accessing Healthcare and for those that have HIV. The center will serve about 300 people, now if other cities would do the same thing what a beautiful world it would be.

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Update

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I am nearly done with the next bit of writing. I am about halfway done with a new Journey chapter, getting close to finished with Tea with a Serpent and am doing a good bit of editing. I am kind of sad that no other stories are firing at the moment, but that is okay. I'll get to them. I am looking forward to ending 300 Rains and a few other stories.

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I was wondering....

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I was digging through old notes on the computer to find something I had plotted for Through the years and I came across the first draft of the story I had made. I had changed from that when I decided to go back and start with Troy as a kid. Slowly the story you all know today moved away from the original plot I had. So I was wondering how many of you would like to see the what could have been.

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A few things...

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A bit of an update on me. I am working 2 jobs now -- both part time.

One of them is a blah-boring-market research firm. Would you like to take a survey?

The other... is the now-famous for its slogan, "Eat Fresh!" and the spokesman that is half the man he used to be, Jared... Subway!

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Rescuing a damsel in distress....

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First I wish to introduce my self my name is Hanna and I just found it with in my self to post one of my stories.
I do try but writing the english language has never gone well and I do blame the nun but in reality is the english fairy and I are at odds with each other and i do need an editor. I hate to ask but I have to put these stories out there there are to many in my mind that I need to shire.

Love and Hugs Hanna

PS I love anime and so I am not complaining but i was wondering why all the art has gone that way, just wondering.

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Three Years and 1 day

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Dear Friends:

Today I have been a member of Big Closet Top Shelf for exactley 3 Years and 1 day.

I want to thank Erin and her staff and everyone else who helps out for their time, hard work and sacrifice which makes this place possible.

Erin, if any of my blogs or comments have caused you heartache or grief, which I am sure some have, I appologize. I will also appologize in advance for the ones I am sure to post during the next year. I will try harder, but sometimes it just does not work
;-).

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a change

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So after reading and commenting on DAW's alias blog it got me thinking. It has been a few years sence I started using Shadowstarr85 and Im almost completly diffrent person.So Ive decided to change my username. Being a unabashed DnD geek I am still using a former character's name

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snow storm leads to car problems.

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Well, I was going to work last night from the trans group Christmas dinner when a massive snow storm hit. I thought I was doing pretty well when disaster hit - the car in front of me span out of control, ending up sideways across two lanes of traffic. At this point I felt like I had three options: I could aim for the concrete barrier to the right of me, the raised island to the left of me, or I could just hit the breaks and hope. I touched the breaks, knew I was going to slide, and so aimed for the island.

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