~* What Dreams May Come *~ “I was starting to wonder if I should come back later,” Katelyn offered as the three of us cleaned up the kitchen, mostly disposing of fast food wrappers and bags. “Sorry,” I started, but she shook her head. “It’s fine. I’m kind of surprised you didn’t tell your parents about me though.” “No, I told them. Back when I was dealing with Jason, Mom told me about his mom’s condition. She said that not everything is black and white, and she really encouraged me to give him another chance.” “Your Mom’s an amazing woman,” she answered quietly. “I didn’t know you almost lost her last summer.” “I’ve been through a lot just to get to be who I am. I guess that’s why I try so hard to get along with others. I know, I remember, what it’s like to be everyone’s target.”

---

I awoke in a strange and unfamiliar house. My vision and mind blurred from the sleep, my instincts told me I would be safe here. I crawled out of bed, remembering this was my new grandmother’s home.

“Good morning Robin,” the elderly woman chirped as she appeared in the doorway. “Did you sleep well?”

I nodded as I approached her. I started to call her ‘Mrs. Rogers’ until I remembered our conversation the night before. “Like a log, Gram,” I answered with a light giggle. “Something smells good.”

~*~

“Robin this is my boyfriend Jim. Jim this is my cousin, Robin.” I shook Brianna’s boyfriend’s hand, and he smiled, the kind of smile I just couldn’t read. Still, he was my new seventeen year old cousin’s boyfriend, so he should be harmless.

“We were just heading out to the lake if you want to come too,” he offered. Brianna grabbed my hand excitedly.

“Please? You don’t want to be stuck inside all day.”

~*~

I walked out onto the pier and sat on the edge. While warm enough to wear shorts and a t-shirt, winter’s grip hadn’t relinquished so much that swimming seemed like a good idea. Still, I dangled my bare feet in the water. I suddenly felt someone’s presence beside me. I turned to see Jim, with Brianna nowhere in sight. His gaze followed my curves up to my face, and he smiled. I looked away, but as I did, I felt his hand lift my chin, turning me to face him, and he kissed me.

I’m sure that Brianna would have enjoyed the passionate exchange. I nearly fell off the pier. It felt wrong somehow. I hated it, and I shoved him away. I burst into tears as I ran away. I must have run all the way back to Gram’s because I soon found myself with my back to her locked front door. I grabbed the phone and I called home.

“Nikki?”

“Hey, what’s wrong?”

“I want to come home,” I sobbed. “My cousin Brianna’s boyfriend… H-he kissed me.”

“You kissed a guy?!” she shrieked.

“No, he kissed me! Nikki, listen-”

But she’d already hung up. I sank to my knees, dropping the phone as I sobbed.

~oOo~

Tears stung my eyes as I sat bolt upright in bed. I grabbed my phone from the nightstand and frantically punched in Nicole’s number.

“Hey cutie,” she answered warmly.

“Nikki, thank God,” I sobbed.

“Robin, what’s wrong?”

“I-I had a horrible nightmare. A guy, and-and you hung up on me!”

“Hold on. I’m coming over,” she answered immediately. I could hear her footsteps, heavy and fast on the stairs as she raced through her house. “What happened, exactly? In your dream I mean?”

“I dreamed I was visiting Ash’s family for Spring Break. A non-existent cousin talked me into going to the lake with her boyfriend, but when we got there, she was gone, leaving just me and him. I sat down on the pier, and he sat next to me. Then he…”

“Robin, what did he do?”

I could hear her car alarm shut off, and the car door slam.

“You shouldn’t drive while talking on a cell phone,” I mumbled.

She hesitantly sighed. “Okay, I’m going to let you go, but I’m calling Ally to check on you until I get there alright?”

I nodded numbly to myself. “Okay. Thanks Nikki. This is so stupid. I’m sorry.”

“It’s NOT stupid, Robin. Trust me on that. I’ll be right there, alright? I’m not just hanging up on you.”

I set my phone aside, wrapping myself in my robe. I needed to get ready for school, but instead stepped out of the room. I had no sooner reached the bottom step when both Allison and Kelly burst through the front door and raced to my side. Allison wrapped me in a hug as Kelly approached just behind her.

“That was fast,” I offered meekly. “I’m sorry for the trouble. I hate being like this.”

Allison quickly shook her head. “Robin, there are still nights when I wake up in tears. You have nothing to apologize for.”

Kelly wrapped me in a hug as she and Allison carefully guided me to the living room. As I sat on the sofa I explained my dream, adding at the end, “I know this sounds completely silly. It’s just, it felt so real. Everything felt so real. When Nikki — I mean, when the Nikki in my dream slammed the phone down on me, it was like someone cut my heart out. Oh Ally,” I buried my face in her shoulder. “Is this what it was like with Mark?”

She blinked, surprised at my question as she stroked my hair. I felt Kelly’s hand on my shoulder.

“What bothered you more, that your cousin’s boyfriend — real or not, kissed you, or Nikki’s reaction?”

I slowly sat up to stare at her. “I-” I started, but hearing the door open, I stood, just as Nicole shouted.

“Robin?”

“In here,” Kelly called back. Nicole sprinted into the room and threw her arms around me. I buried myself in the security of her embrace. Kelly stood, and Nicole took her place, gently putting me between Allison and herself. “I’m going to make some tea.”

“It’s okay. I’m here,” Nicole cooed.

“I’m sorry,” I whimpered. “It’s just a stupid dream. I shouldn’t let it get to me.”

She shook her head. “I tried to tell you before, dreams aren’t ‘real’, but the feelings they can cause are.”

With a pause, and a deep, calm breath, she glanced between the two of us. “I never told anyone this, but when I first moved here, when Bob and Gina took me in as a foster child, I had to be hospitalized just so they could make me take medicine to help me sleep. I wouldn’t take it otherwise. I didn’t want to sleep because I didn’t want to dream.”

Nicole cupped my face in her hands, and she smiled at me. “I know because I’ve been to those dark places.”

Allison peered over my shoulder at Nicole, a worried look on her face. Whatever her thoughts, she kept them to herself as she hugged me. “And I already told you about my bad dreams after the … ‘incident’ with that creepy guy last summer. Even with Barbara’s help, I still sometimes wake up crying.”

I sniffed as I nodded. The telltale whistle of a kettle from the kitchen suggested the tea would be ready soon. “It’s not just what he did. It’s the whole thing. He kissed me, and it made me feel … ‘wrong’ inside. I don’t know how to put it into words.”

Nicole smiled gently as she kissed my forehead. “It’s like being forced to write with the wrong hand?”

I nodded quickly. “Yes, exactly, only a lot worse. And then when I raced back to my grandma’s to call, you freaked out over me kissing a guy, and hung up on me. It felt like my heart had been ripped out and thrown against a wall.”

“Oh, Robin,” she sounded apologetic as she pulled me closer. I rested my head on her shoulder as a fresh wave of tears worked their way out.

“You’re not just my girlfriend. You’re one of my best friends. Even if someday we don’t feel the same way we do now, I’ll always love you, and I’ll never hurt you. Do you know why?”

I shook my head slowly. Kelly appeared in the doorway carrying a saucer with a steaming cup atop it. She knelt to offer it to me as Nicole continued.

“It’s because I know how much betrayal hurts. I didn’t dump Jason. He dumped me. In a way I guess I did betray him by staying with him, but it still hurt either way. For what it’s worth though, every single time I kissed him, I felt exactly what you did in your drea. I stayed with him because I thought that’s what girls did.” She hesitated.

“I remember the first time you kissed me,” I softly picked up as I accepted the herbal tea, taking a slow sip before continuing. “You said that there was no way I could be a guy because you wanted to kiss me from the moment you saw me.”

Nicole giggled under her breath as she nodded. “When I kiss you, it’s the most wonderful, euphoric ‘spark’. And I feel it every single time. It never stops feeling as wonderful as the first. Frankly you could shave your head and wear baggy clothes if you wanted, and I’d still love you because no matter how the outside changes, you’re you in here.” she placed her hand over my breastbone.

I felt Kelly squeeze my hand gently. “I’m going to go get ready for work. Are you going to be okay?”

I nodded quickly, handing my half-empty mug and saucer to Nicole as I stood. I threw my arms around Kelly’s neck, pressing my cheek to hers for only a moment. “I’ll be okay, I think. Thank you for coming to check on me.”

She smiled warmly. “That’s what big sisters do.”

Nicole and Allison followed me upstairs. Nicole still had my tea in-hand. She set it on my nightstand as I disappeared into my closet. “I know it wasn’t ‘me’ me, but I still feel like I should apologize for hanging up on you,” she offered. I poked my head around the closet door. She had her gaze cast down, with Allison wrapping her in a hug. I stepped closer to join them.

“The thing is, I think ‘her’ reaction was a reflection on me, on how I felt. It wasn’t just ‘wrong’, Nikki. I also felt like I betrayed you.”

“Even so,” she answered. Allison goosed her sides gently, causing her to jump right into my arms. Our lips met briefly, and she giggled, wrapping her arms around my neck as she rested her forehead to mine. “If you ever tell me a guy kissed you, my first reaction’s not going to be to yell at you. It’s going to be to knock his teeth down his throat.” She smiled demurely.

Allison giggled. “I need to finish getting ready for school. Robin, are you sure you’re okay?”

“I’m okay now. For what it’s worth, I was just telling Mrs. Ellis last week that this is exactly why I’m glad I have you guys. With the way alliances and popularity are constantly shifting, I’m still learning what it is to ‘be’ a girl in high school. Without you and Jen and Nikki, I’d be lost.”

She smiled as she stepped closer, hugging us both. “I love you Robin. I’ve said it before, but you and Nikki are like sisters to me. There’s nothing I wouldn’t do for you.” She smiled over her shoulder as she paused at the door. “Well, almost nothing. There’s just no way Nikki will ever get me to go goth. I look too much like a walking Barbie doll,” she teased.

Nicole giggled. “She forgot about those Heedless Despair dolls Jen makes in her spare time.”

~oOo~

School that day, and in fact, most of the rest of the week, progressed fairly normally. Katelyn refused to talk to Chelsea, but she stopped sneering at me in passing. We couldn’t find Allison at lunch Wednesday, out of character for her since she always ate with us, though Kathy managed to convince Elaine to fill the empty seat. Elaine’s tray only contained a modest salad and a fruit cup, but at least she ate all of it.

Thursday afternoon, an all-call across the school intercom went out, requesting that the girls’ basketball team convene in the gym, just after lunch.

“What’s going on?” Maria asked as Allison and I met up with her in the hall. I shrugged.

“No idea. I haven’t heard anything.”

Katelyn caught up to us a moment later. “I hope this isn’t about what happened with me and Chelsea. You know, skipping a game and all.”

Allison shook her head. “If it was something like that they would’ve just called you, Chelsea and Robin down. Coach Wilson wouldn’t humiliate you in front of the whole team like that.”

She gave a faint smile at that. “I guess you’re right. Oh, there’s Brittany,” she called. Brittany stopped, turning back to us at hearing her name. “What’s going on?”

Brittany waited for us to catch up to her before continuing toward the gym alongside us. “Don’t tell me you guys already forgot. Our varsity jackets arrived today. They were supposed to be done before basketball season ended, but there was a mix-up at the factory.”

“Yay,” Allison cheered. “What do they look like?”

“They’re the same as the other varsity jackets — purple body, gold leather sleeves, big ‘T’ on the front with accomplishment patch inserts, and a big Tiger on the back. Unlike cheer jackets ours will have our team number on the sleeve below our names too.”

“What kinds of accomplishment patches are there?” I asked. “I’ve never lettered in anything so this is all new to me.”

Katelyn stared at me with surprise. “Never? Who lit a fire under your ass this year?” Her words had a bite to them, but Maria had assured me Katelyn was trying, so I gave her the benefit of the doubt.

“It’s a really, really long story, but I’ll tell you about it sometime if you want.”

Katelyn grew silent at that, and Brittany picked up again.

“Accomplishment patches represent stuff you’ve been involved with in school. Like for me and Katelyn, we’re in choir, plus I’m a co-captain on the basketball team so mine will have a basketball and a Co-Capt. insert on the ‘T’, and I’ll probably put a metal varsity pin for choir somewhere.”

“Oh, that’s so cool,” I mused as we entered the gym, adding, “I didn’t even know you guys were in choir.”

Katelyn genuinely smiled. “I love music. My parents made me take piano lessons when I was little, but I learned to love it, and to love singing. It’s what drew me to Heedless Despair. I don’t think I ever asked if you guys are into music.” She turned her attention to Allison and me. Allison held up her left hand, showing off her rather impressive set of calluses on her fingertips.

“I play a little lead guitar, but mostly rhythm, and Robin plays some piano.”

“Only some?” Katelyn echoed with just a hint of curiosity in her tone.

“Yeah,” I answered simply as we rounded the corner into the gym. “I mean, Ally’s sister is teaching me a little, but unlike Nikki I just don’t have much talent for music.”

Katelyn snickered. “Oh please. Anyone can learn to play piano. Classical style takes years of practice, but non-classical is a lot more forgiving. I’ll bet I could teach you to play like a pro in an afternoon, assuming you can read simple notation. Are you busy Friday night?”

“This way, ladies; we just need to check that your jackets fit properly,” Coach Wilson interrupted.

I shook my head. “I have Kenpo in the evening, but I’m spending the night at my step-dad’s before the big cheer retreat. I’ll give you the address if you want to stop by. I have to ask though-”

“You’ll see,” she answered simply. Allison had a rather surprised look on her face as we were ushered into the girls’ locker rooms where Coach Greer stood chatting with a couple of older women. Coach Greer smiled as she turned to us.

“I’m proud of all of you. I know for most of you this is your first letterman’s jacket. Remember, these have plenty of space to add more patches for more achievements; just be sure to clear it with your respective coaches first.”

They went down the list of names in alphabetical order starting with Katelyn and working their way through the list. I’d thought the others would’ve gone back to class as each girl got her jacket, but they waited until the end, when Coach Greer called me forward.

I stepped forward to accept my jacket, inspecting the patch-work on the sleeve, where my name and basketball number had been embroidered. A basketball patch sat at the left bar of the Tiger ‘T’, and something I hadn’t expected on the shoulder of the other sleeve. In the same embroidered scrawl as my name, the word ‘Spirit’ in dark purple, contrasted the bright gold leather. I looked up at Coach Greer, who smiled as she shook her head. Coach Wilson did as well.

“We’re innocent,” Coach Wilson added, clearly fighting a grin. “That was your teammates’ idea.”

Brittany and Chelsea stepped forward. I think I surprised Brittany when, after slipping into my new varsity jacket, I hugged them both. Brittany smiled wryly.

“I know I was really hard on you before, but after what your dad did for me, I,” she paused, and Chelsea picked up.

“She wanted to do something to make up for it, so we brainstormed and came up with this; a custom patch so everyone will know why people keep screaming ‘Spirit’ when they see you,” she teased.

~oOo~

Friday evening marked my first Kenpo class since the wedding. I still wasn’t quite ready to take my driving test yet, so I hitched a ride with Nicole. She disappeared to track down a bottled water for me while I worked on my warm-up stretches.

“Hey Robin,” Ash spoke warmly as he approached. I had been in the middle of a modified stretch I learned from Sasha, but quickly leapt to my feet to hug him. I bowed a moment later.

“Sensei,” I added respectfully. He smiled.

“Given the circumstances, you can call me Ash during practice if it feels more comfortable.”

“Actually,” I started. “Well, I don’t really know how to say this. The others on the cheer squad have pretty much started calling you ‘Robin’s dad’ now.”

He let out a good-natured laugh at that, giving me cause to sigh with relief. “How did that come about?”

“It’s a long story. Basically it all started when Amy Lynn, one of the seniors, had to move. She didn’t have any family here she could stay with, so,” I went on to explain, while resuming my warm-up exercises, everything he had missed over the last few weeks.

“Sounds like you’ve been busy. I’m sorry things didn’t work out for your routine. For what it’s worth if anyone on the squad wants to learn real Kenpo, I have room in one of my beginner classes.”

“Thanks Sen- I mean Ash,” I corrected myself.

“By the way, whose yellow car was that sitting in your sister’s driveway?”

I giggled. “Oh, that’s-” I started, but remembering Nicole mentioned he helped finance the project. “Oh, very funny,” I teased. “Thank you for helping with that. You really didn’t have to do that.”

“Your grades are more than enough to get you into college even without your trust fund. I was happy to help.” He turned to walk away just as Nicole approached.

“Nikki? Are you okay?”

She nodded slowly as she handed me the water bottle. Allison came racing over a moment later. “Nikki, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean for you to find out like this.” I blinked and turned to Allison. She shifted her gaze away, biting her lip.

Nicole shook her head as she turned back to Allison, giving her a gentle hug. “It’s okay. I’m not upset or anything, just kind of shocked. I’m sorry I walked in on you two like that,” she offered apologetically.

Allison’s cheeks burned as she stifled a giggle. “It’s weird. I didn’t want this, but I can’t help it. I just hope Jen’s going to be okay with it.”

I glanced between the two of them slowly. “What are you talking about?”

Allison turned back to me with a sheepish smile. “Sorry. Nikki just walked in on me … kissing Josh. I can explain though. At school Tuesday, I couldn’t get what you asked me out of my head, about how I felt about Mark breaking up with me. I never dated before, and being dumped like that hurt worse than I realized. I bumped into Josh as I left the girls’ room, and he could tell something was bothering me.”

Josh picked up where she left off, causing the three of us to jump. “We talked for awhile, and I took her out to the movies that night then out to lunch Wednesday. It wasn’t really a date. I just wanted to be sure she was okay.”

Allison nodded. She giggled under her breath. “Tonight was the first time we … I mean, nothing happened before then. We were just friends. I guess we still are,” she added, confused as she turned back to him.

He smiled as he nodded. “Just because Jen and I aren’t dating anymore, doesn’t mean I want to cause problems for her or anything. She’s a good person.”

Allison smiled as she leaned up to kiss his cheek. “You’re such a sweetheart. I’ll talk to her tomorrow about it, girl to girl. We’ve been friends too long to let a guy come between us.” She paused, biting her lip. “Even if he is an amazing kisser.” She giggled under her breath, her cheeks turning red as she walked away to find a place to sit.

“Sorry about all that,” Nicole offered sheepishly as she turned to follow Allison. Josh turned back to me.

“So is this a normal girl thing?” he asked as he rubbed the back of his neck. “I mean, I really was just worried about her, and the next thing I know we’re, well,” he fumbled. “It’s not that I didn’t enjoy it, and Allison is incredibly cute.”

“We’re a strange species. We’re constantly worried about how others see us. Ally’s obviously worried Jen will think she ‘stole’ you, especially after what happened with Katelyn.”

“Wait, who’s Katelyn?” he asked, even more confused. I shook my head slowly.

“Okay, let’s try this another way. Do you mind sparring with me?”

He bowed and fell into a fighting stance. I followed suit, lunging forward as I explained the situation. “Ally likes you, obviously, but because you and Jen were dating, she’s worried about hurting Jen. She’s going to talk to her about it.”

I thrust a fake punch which caught him off-guard, moving in for the kill with a low sweeping kick. He leapt, just barely dodging, and retaliated with a soft strike to my stomach.

“So what happens now?” he asked. I shifted to the side and stepped in, grabbing his arm and using his momentum as he attempted to dodge to throw him. I smiled as I offered my hand to help him back to his feet.

“That’s up to them now. It’s going to depend on how mutual your breakup was, and whether Jen still has feelings for you. Sorry about that.”

He laughed as he stood. “Don’t be. That was a pretty good move. Listen, Robin, I,” he hesitated a moment, “Thanks. I believe Ally when she says she didn’t mean for any of this to happen. I feel the same way. I mean, she just broke up with Mark a few weeks ago and all. I still sent Jen flowers for Valentine’s Day just because I felt bad about the timing. He didn’t even have the courtesy to do that.”

I couldn’t help giggling. “You really are a sweetheart. I’m sorry things didn’t work out with Jen, but,” I glanced over at Allison, sitting with Nicole and Maria, giggling to themselves. “Maybe things with Ally will be different.”

~oOo~

Since Allison wanted to get a ride home with Josh, Nicole and I decided to go out and get a bite to eat before we headed back home. ‘Home’ normally meant Margie’s, but tonight it would be bonding time with Mom and my new step-dad, so we made sure to get an extra order for them, as well as for Katelyn, in case she came over after all.

I nervously fidgeted with the drinking straw in my cup as we neared Ash’s street. Victoria only lived a few blocks away, and Jennifer lived within walking distance, so it wasn’t as though I was staying in a completely different town.

I spotted my car sitting in the driveway of an amazing house. I’d never actually been to Ash’s, and didn’t really know what to expect; it easily rivaled Victoria’s. A small red bicycle sat leaned against the house.

Nicole perked up as she saw my car. “Oh, that must be it.”

“Yeah, I asked Mom if she could move it for me since I just got it insured this week, and I’m still not allowed to drive by myself until I have a few more hours behind the wheel.”

“Sometimes I forget I’m the only one that’s been driving since the age of thirteen,” Nicole giggled to herself as she pulled into the drive.

I grabbed the extra drinks, careful not to spill anything on my new jacket, while Nicole bumped her door closed with her backside, waiting to walk me to the door. Ahead, the front light switched on and the door opened. Mom stood smiling just inside the doorway.

“There you girls are,” she called cheerfully as she reached out to take some of the load we were carrying. “Oh, you brought dinner too?”

Nicole giggled. “Sort of a housewarming gift.”

Mom laughed as she turned to step into the living room, leading us through to the kitchen. While much larger, the layout reminded me a little bit of our home back in San Francisco; it even had a door to the kitchen on a hinge that caused it to swing closed on its own.

“Ash should be here soon. Your friend Katelyn’s been here about thirty minutes,” she trailed off, turning back to stare at me.

“Robin? Is that what I think it is?”

Nicole giggled as she elbowed me lightly, and replied in a stage whisper, “She means your jacket.”

“Oh!” I did a quick spin. Mom rushed over to hug me.

“It’s gorgeous. Robin I’m so proud of you!”

“Thanks. I’m really proud of it. The people that run the concession stand put part of the proceeds toward our jackets this year, so we only had to pay like, thirty dollars per girl. Oh, check this out,” I turned, pointing to the ‘Spirit’ on my sleeve. “The girls on the team did that for me.”

I could faintly hear water running just off from the kitchen, and Katelyn stepped out of a small alcove-sized half-bathroom a moment later as Mom asked, “Spirit? Your camp name?”

Nicole giggled as she retrieved our burgers from the fast food bags. “Everywhere we go, every time someone from camp recognizes her, they scream ‘Spirit!’”

I waved Katelyn over. “Hey, glad you could make it. We brought dinner.”

“Aw, thanks,” she answered in a slightly warmer tone than I’d come to expect.

We sat down at the dinner table, and my mother did something she hadn’t done in years. She gently bowed her head, and she said grace. Nicole and I shared a surprised glance, but she reached under the table to squeeze my hand, and I took my mother’s.

~oOo~

“I was starting to wonder if I should come back later,” Katelyn offered as the three of us cleaned up the kitchen, mostly disposing of fast food wrappers and bags.

“Sorry,” I started, but she shook her head.

“It’s fine. I’m kind of surprised you didn’t tell your parents about me though.”

“No, I told them. Back when I was dealing with Jason, Mom told me about his mom’s condition. She said that not everything is black and white, and she really encouraged me to give him another chance.”

“Your Mom’s an amazing woman,” she answered quietly. “I didn’t know you almost lost her last summer.”

“I’ve been through a lot just to get to be who I am. I guess that’s why I try so hard to get along with others. I know, I remember, what it’s like to be everyone’s target. Anyway, my keyboard’s upstairs. I’ll warn you now though, my new bedroom’s pretty bare. I haven’t had a chance to decorate yet.”

Nicole smiled as she pulled me into a hug. “I should get home. You guys have fun. And call me before you leave for cheer camp, okay?”

Katelyn sheepishly turned aside as Nicole and I shared a brief kiss. I hugged her close and smiled as I whispered, “Sweet dreams, vampire.”

“G’night cutie,” she giggled as she turned to skip out.

“New bedroom?” Katelyn echoed, as if to pretend the whole scene never happened.

“Sorry about that,” I offered. “I forget not everyone’s used to seeing me with Nikki.”

“It’s okay, really. I mean, yeah, at first it was kind of weird, but you’ve been really cool about it. It’s not at all what I expected. I mean, you don’t hang around the showers and stare or whatever. You’re just another teammate, you know?”

“Just another girl?” I teased, causing her to crack a smile. I turned to start upstairs. “Anyway, I’ve been living with my half-sister since June.”

“Oh, hang on, I forgot something.” She turned to head back downstairs while I continued into my room. Unlike my bedroom at Margie’s, my new room had polished hardwood floors with simple white walls. The bed, approximately the same size as my old bed, had new sheets and a comforter, though with my laptop downstairs and my keyboard set up under the large window, there wasn’t much else.

I sat at the padded bench and started to play while I waited for Katelyn, a pretty simple accompaniment version of John Lennon’s Imagine. An incredibly beautiful Soprano voice picked up the lyrics. I looked over my shoulder, and I had to smile seeing Katelyn standing behind me, holding a folder with a few sheets of music peeking out the side.

Imagine there’s no heaven.
It’s easy if you try.
No Hell below us.
Above us only sky.

When I stopped, she sat down beside me, staring silently at the keyboard for a moment. “I love that song. Did someone put you up to this?” she asked, though not accusingly.

I shook my head. “It’s a song Kelly’s been teaching me. I can play the basic accompaniment, but I still fumble the right-hand part.”

She set the folder on the floor beside her, pulling out a single sheet of paper. Unlike most of the music Kelly had been teaching me from, this piece only had the treble clef and some chord markings. She placed it on the sheet music stand, turning to me.

“You said you can read standard notation, right? Every Good Boy Does Fine and FACE? What about chords?”

I nodded. “I’m not very fast. I still have to count the lines, but I’m getting better. I know some major chords, but I’m at a loss after that.”

She giggled. “The secret to a lot of piano playing is what’s called a lead sheet. When you play something note-for-note treble and bass clefs in classical style, you’re just playing an arrangement of the piece. I’ve had six years of lessons so I’m not knocking it at all, but when you play from a lead sheet though,” she placed her hands on the keyboard, and with an intermittent rhythm and a few simple chords, had an amazing jazz-sound coming out of the old speakers of my electronic keyboard.

“You’re making your own. It’s not just jazz either. It’s Blues, Rock, and it even works for traditional stuff. It’s like a guitarist strumming chords, only without the ugly calluses.” She smiled as she stood. “Here, try it out. Just play the chords as they’re listed on the sheet, and I’ll sing the melody.”

As I played a simple two-beat rhythm to the chords she began to sing.

The water’s wide. I cannot get over,
And neither have I wings to fly.
Build me a boat that can carry two,
And both shall row, my love and I.

I stared blankly up at her. “Katelyn, that’s… that’s incredible.”

“Don’t get too excited. It still takes some work to figure out what chord style sounds right for each song, but that’s what makes being a musician fun — not repeating dots on paper, but interpreting it and making it your own.”

I shook my head as I stood. “I’m not talking about my playing. I’m talking about your voice. I had no idea you could sing like that.”

Her cheeks flushed a brilliant crimson as she turned away. “I told you the other day that I’ve been singing for years. I really want to take classical training, but to do that I’d have to get a part time job. Double the schedule, double the stress.”

“I hear that,” I answered simply. She laughed.

“Terrible pun, but you’re right.” Her gaze slowly shifted back to me again. “I didn’t realize that you and Chels are going through the same stuff I am, until Maria told me you quit the paper.”

“For what it’s worth, I’m kind of jealous now,” I teased. “You have an incredible voice. I could never do what you do.”

She smiled at that. “I guess everybody’s good at something. Here, I have a more modern piece I wanted to show you,” she added, turning to kneel beside her music folder again.

“Have you thought about teaching piano? I mean, for money?”

She slowly stared up at me as I sat again. “I don’t know if I’d have the time, but maybe a couple of hours a week on Saturdays. Tutors do make pretty decent money. Thanks Robin,” she offered as she stood, placing the next piece of music on the stand.

“No problem. Just work out how much you want to charge, and I’ll pay you Monday.”

“What? No way, this is just-” she hesitated.

“Just what?”

She smiled sheepishly. “This is just something fun, between friends. I thought you had a piano teacher already?”

“Kelly and I have been talking about finding someone who’s more experienced. She only took lessons for a couple of years when she was our age. She wants me to learn from someone who’s had more exposure to technique and style. I think she’s interested in learning as well.”

“I see. Well, we’ll figure something out. Will you be here next week, or…?”

“At my sister’s. I’ll give you the address, and for what it’s worth, you’ll have access to a baby grand there.”

“Awesome,” she answered, barely fighting a broad smile. “This doesn’t mean I trust you.” Every single time she’d said that to me before, she had either been glaring or, at best, giving me a blank, emotionless stare. This time, she smiled, though I thought I saw a hint of sadness in her eyes. “I do feel bad about all this. I really liked Scott, but when I saw him with Chelsea right after he dumped me,” she sighed.

“But if I was wrong about you, maybe I was wrong about her too. I’ll … talk to her tomorrow morning before we leave. Maybe if I attend a leadership camp or something this summer I can even make Captain next year.”

“You know the Girl Scouts are always looking for new girls. One of the biggest impacts on my life was becoming a Counselor in Training at camp this last year.”

“Girl Scouts? You're kidding right?”

“You have all these girls looking to you for advice and to set the example. I mean, don’t get me wrong, there’s no way I’d try out for Captain, either for basketball or cheer, but it still helped me become a better person.”

“I’ll think about it,” she answered.

“As an added bonus, Coach Greer is our district’s organizer. She’s also the sister-in-law of the camp director, so you could score some brownie points.”

“I like the way you think. Now let’s get back to the lesson. I want to show you a few more neat tricks. I’ll still teach you classical style starting next week if you’re still interested, but classical and pop are different animals — both of them ‘right’ for different circumstances.” I turned to look over the new sheet of music, only now noticing the title.

“Beauty and the Beast - this is the song from the ballroom scene isn’t it?”

“Maria told me it was your favorite, so I checked my old files. All this stuff’s a Xerox of the originals so you can keep it, by the way.”

I couldn’t help it. I reached out to hug her. Much like with Jason, I only wanted to come out of this with my sanity intact. I never thought I’d find a friend, and a kindred spirit, on the other side.