I feel like I'm a horrible person.

The stuff that is most upsetting to me, the gender dysphoria, the PTSD, they are so PETTY.

So insignificant compared to the suffering of others, especially right now.

Sighs ... I could use a hug or three ..

So here we are and after an action filled day I bring you a new set of Photographs!

I'm going to be interviewed for a segment on Pride month next week. Wish me luck, wont you?

Hey everyone,

Just a quick note here to let you all know that I probably won't be posting much of anything this week, if indeed anything at all. The last week and a half has been pretty rough. My PTSD, anxiety, and depression have been in high gear and playing around with my head and heart like a soccer ball, and I haven't been sleeping due to the insomnia and nightmares. This was making it hard enough to focus on writing anything, but now I've caught a cold and it's making it impossible to get anything done.

I woke everybody in the house up at about 6 AM by screaming, thanks to a knee that decided to try and take a powder on me. Between that and a double gut-punch of PTSD and dysphoria last night, and today is not starting off well ..

Look around, around

Been around a long time...feels like longer but the official counter must know better...

If you wish to honor this achievement, donations to food banks, Humane Society, and the ASPCA are all welcome...don't want to feed anyone or animals, consider a donation to the site :)

{{Huggles}}

P.S. Don't feel obligated to give to anything you don't believe in or can't afford, I'm just being silly :)

Anybody who has gone through male puberty can tell you, it's stressful. It's stressful enough for a cis boy with no other major stressors, but it was worse in my case, as neither of those things was true for me.

The worst part was whenever I got aroused, and my male equipment did what it's supposed to do under those circumstances. Those moments were incredibly painful, both physically and psychologically, and I sometimes feel I barely survived them.

yes, its that time of the week again!

Dang, where did the evening go?

"10 years, 12 months".

That's how long my account says I've been a member here.

I honestly dont know what I would have done if I hadn't found this place, but its unlikely I would have found the courage to transition without the support I got here.

Thank you all, for 11 wonderful years, and I'm hoping I get many more.

I think it just happened again! I was writing chapter 2 of Kronos when my keyboard stopped working. I tried typing in other places besides word, but it wasn’t doing anything. I went to turn off my computer and then the mouse froze. I tried doing a hard reset (holding the power button) and it didn’t do anything either. After a few minutes my laptop turned off, but the power button is staying lit and won’t do anything when I press it.

but is it the end of summer?

Not a second part but the whole thing re-edited!

My Muse issued another 4 hour challenge

A four hour challenge is a form of improvisation. The goal sometimes is to work through a writer's block and overcome one's distraction.

Anyone can do it. Like getting into shape, you can't start off by running a four minute mile.

A four hour challenge is like a wind sprint. I not expecting Coleridge or Dickens to issue forth out of me. What I am trying to achieve is to flex my brain into brainstorming and letting the creative juices flow more freely.

Other than the obvious benefit of the quarantine, there is a side affect. I do not have to worry about people dropping in unexpectedly and catching me in mutually awkward attire.

Hey everyone,

Due to a power outage yesterday that cost me a lot of progress, and some issues getting the chapter to feel right,the new chapter of Twice Removed won't be finished today. I will try for tomorrow, but depending on how well it goes, it may be delayed to next week. Sorry about this, but the power outage really threw off my writing groove. :(

*big hugs to all*

Amethyst

So last night, I got to thinking about a conversation I had a few days ago, where I mentioned I always found kissing someone on the lips upsetting. And in fact I used to say I'd rather kiss or be kissed anywhere but the lips. As I was mulling this over, it occurred to me that this sense of panic reminded me of the panic I got going into a shower, and I wondered if it has a similar cause - that at some point, a kiss on the lips got associated with something terrible, something I couldnt recall consciously recall but my body responded to.

For the first time I was able to wear a dress for Easter service. One benefit of shelter in place, online church service.

not far from here!

Happy Easter!

In my dreams!

So my wife was tested yesterday, and the results came back this afternoon - she tested positive for Covid-19. That makes my two sons and I ”Presumptive Positive” as well. No big shock there as both of my sons and my wife all had the same symptoms - low grade fever, muscle and joint aches, severe headache, abdominal pains and diarrhea, as well as loss of sense of smell and taste.