Autobiographical

so today I got my head examined

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so I got a CT scan done of my noggin, and am now waiting to learn the results.

I'm not sure what would be worse - them finding something wrong, or not finding anything wrong.

ah, well.

huggles appreciated.

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its my 15th anniversary of being here!

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So according to my account, I have been a member here for "14 years, 12 months" which means if my math is correct, its my 15th anniversary.

Thank you to everyone who has commented on any of my blogs and stories, and a special thanks to Erin and her elves for keeping this place going.

Best group of crazies I've ever met!

Huggles for everybody!

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I owe everybody here an Apologie.

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For the last several weeks, I've been here, but not really here. I have fallen behind on responding to comments and giving comments to those wonderful ladies who stories bring me so much joy and happyness. I feel like I owe the whole community an apology and I must explain why. Well to start I was sick on Easter Sunday, and so I went to the local clinic and tested postived for streph throat. Again. So that was ten more days on the antibotic train. I was barely over strep when my father woke up one morning peeing blood.

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Further blood work

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As I may have mentioned, a lot of blood results came back yesterday and I have questions.

A further blood test appeared today - it seems I have MRSA :( No wonder I was feeling cold!

I do get Staph infections from time to time and they suck the heat out of me, which is one way I recognise them. Oh, well, off to the doctor tomorrow. They won't operate on me unless I can nuke this from orbit.

Penny

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my celling is falling down

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so a couple of days ago, we noticed a crack in the ceiling in our bathroom, that had water leaking out of it.

we called the building maintenance person, and after taking a look he said he'd need to get into the suite above us, and no one there was home, so he planned to try again today.

In the meantime, the crack has turned into a piece of the ceiling barely hanging on by one corner, and the water situation is worse.

Hopefully this get fixed before we have to evacuate the apartment.

hugs appreciated.

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going to be a very busy week next week

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So next week, I'm going to be super busy being the taxi for my aunt, as well as having another attempt at getting a mold for my new dentures.

It means I'm going to have to make sure I squeeze in down time for myself whenever I can, so I may not be around much.

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so yesterday was mostly a flop

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So yesterday I went to the denturist to get a mold for my dentures, and it was mostly a flop.

My gag reflex just refused to cooperate long enough for them to get a good impression on my top teeth, so I am going to have to go back and try again a week from Thursday.

Sighs, I need huggles, anybody got some to spare?

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I am going to need dentures

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so my dentist had to give me the bad news - I am going to need dentures, as my teeth are causing too many issues.

I cant help feeling like a failure. If I could have overcome my tendency to skip on my self care, its possible I could have avoided this.

ah, well.

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had an odd conversation with Sharon

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Well, I just had an odd conversation with Sharon.

She told me that while she cares for me, and always found being with me "fun", she loved me and still loves me like a buddy or a brother, and was never deeply in love with me. She then apologized for not being able to feel deeply in love with me.

I'm not sure what to do with this. I forgave her, but beyond that, I'm kind of stumped.

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Passing in public

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I have not written much recently. This is partly due to being unhappy at work. I just get home, eat go to the local pool to exercise ( my diabetes is getting out of control, so I must exercise.) Then come home watch TV and sleep. Rinse and repeat.

One of the reasons I write is to express my feminine side. I still don't know if I am really trans or not. I grew up wishing I was a girl. I was 3 or 4 when I asked why I was not a girl. When I dress now, there is no sexual thrill, just a sense of relief. When I am "made up" I just feel that I am looking at the real me.

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I have a cousin in the ICU

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So I just got a call from my aunt saying her son is in the ICU after having his heart stop.

He's struggled with mental health and addiction issues for years, but I am still a little surprised.

Anyway hugs and prayers appreciated.

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Many Thanks!!

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This is Amy, Piper’s wife. I just wanted to thank everyone for the donations as well as their patience. As previously stated, the gas bill has been paid off and the new goal of $2400 will cover the rest of what is needed for electric.

I along with Piper, and our Ninja cannot thank y’all enough for the support!

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Anniversaries

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I wrote a blog post on one of my sites this week after some anniversaries happened.

One such was 12 years use of a social media account on 20 March. That led me to check a domain I use, and that is 12 years and a month old. Then I found a photo taken 18 March 2008 during my first transition (I lasted 6 weeks, no support).

18Mar2008_Kingfisher_BlueSkirt.jpg

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More Updates!

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So good news! The Natural Gas bill is paid off in its entirety (or will be once the payments we made have been posted to the account), and not only have we taken a chunk out of the electric bill, but the utility adjusted the bill after we noticed they didn't shut off the service when we requested it!

As such, we have lowered our GoFundMe goal to represent this change.

Because of these changes and some extremely generous donations from BC Members, we are more than halfway over our goal!

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Housing Updates

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We found a house! Well, specifically, we found an apartment!

We were initially denied due to credit, but we were given insight on how to appeal and told it would likely go through.

We are still at the same hotel, and we are working hard to get on payment plans for a few things and pay off our utility bills, some of which we recently found had never been disconnected as we had requested.

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Concerning Depression

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My heart goes out to my fellow trans ladies out there struggling with Depression and thoughts of harm. I have only been 'out' to the world since last Labor Day, having been firmly in the closet since age 7-8. This past holiday season was my worst ever, being shunned by my children and a large part of my relatives.

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I went for a walk this afternoon…….

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My day started out very well. The weather was gorgeous - sunny and warm, with just a light breeze blowing; much nicer than February should be in upstate NY. I actually had a reasonably decent night’s sleep the night before, which has not been a given for me since I was a teen and especially moreso over the past few decades.

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